Sighing on Sunday by Megan Hill

 Sighing on Sunday 

by Megan Hill

40 Meditations for When Church Hurts

I was attracted to this book as Church Hurt is a subject which is close to my heart.  I think I am not alone when I say that we have all been hurt in church and by church at some time in our lives. We are meant to be a family of God and as in all human families there are disagreements and sometimes they can hurt really deeply particularly as we imagine that as Christians we should be immune from such but the New Testament writers show us that this is not always the case. Many times Paul had to write and sort out problems. This is a book that I would recommend particularly as it brings to light some issues that need to be addressed by the church today - if we do not learn from our mistakes how can we grow? Unfortunately today so many problems and hurts are wiped under the carpet and a "we don't speak about them" attitude develops. There are so many turning away from our churches for this very reason and it is hard when you have been either on the receiving end or have been the one involved in the hurt.  Thankfully Jesus understands and he was able to restore even those disciples of his who abandoned him at the time he needed them most of all. Our God is the God of second chances and yes even third and fourth chances. Sadly too many Christians do not consider this point and refuse to have anything more to do with individuals and churches because of this. We need to read, mark and learn and this book helps us to do exactly that. It can be used individually or in a group session but be prepared for wounds to be opened up and perhaps even for more problems to surface than we realised!

Here is the blurb on the book:

In the first section (“What Is Happening?”), we’ll see seven different kinds of hurt that believers experience in the church. We’ll discover that the Bible doesn’t ignore the reality of hurt in the covenant community; in fact, Scripture testifies that believers throughout history have experienced it.

Next, we’ll ask the question “Why Is Church So Hard?” and answer it by looking at some big truths about why hurt happens.

Then we’ll consider “Why Should I Trust God When Church Hurts?” and see how the character of our God can lead us to trust him in the midst of trials. The fourth section, “What Can I Do?,” examines godly responses that we should have when we are hurt and warns against some common tactics of Satan that would draw us into deeper misery.

Fifth, we’ll turn our attention to Christ’s relationship to the church and ask “Why Should I Keep Showing Up?” Finally, we’ll consider the answer to the question, “What Have Others Done in My Situation?” and see how the people from the first section were able to flourish even after hurt.

In section 1 Megan looks at 7 hurts within church:

I'm being neglected
I'm being sinned against
I'm enduring difficult personal circumstances
I'm observing congregational conflict
I'm Grieving changes
I'm being led by sinful shepherds
I'm being rejected.

In Section 2 Megan gives 4 fundametal reasons for hurt in the church:

The Fall's effect
Satan's Schemes
Human Weakness
Human Sin

We need to distinguish which hard situations are deliberately orchestrated, which are simply repercussions of a broken world, which actions are malicious and which may arise from someone's frailty.

I loved section 1 - it is set out as a discussional type study of each hurt which allows you to go deeper. Each "hurt" has a bible quotation and an explanation which is really useful as you identify the hurt referred to.

Section 1 What is Happening?

I'm being neglected

2 Timothy 4 verse 16 "At my first defense no-one came to stand by me and all deserted me."

Paul is standing alone. He had pastored and prayed for churches throughout his long imprisonment and now the day has arrived to stand before magistrates to face his charges. He looks out over the crowd for a familiar face - not a single church member showed up. Everyone had abandoned him to his fate. The people chose not to accompany him, they deserted him. Just like Jesus' disciples on the night he was arrested.

Maybe you have been in a similar situation. Maybe people in church didn't realise you were going through a hard time. Maybe you never heard their prayers for you. Maybe they never checked up on you. Maybe you have been in the position where your talents and gifts in the church have not been recognised. Or maybe you have been serving for so long that you are taken for granted now. Remember this - the Lord still sees you! The verse quoted goes on to say "but the Lord stood by me".

At the end of this part there is another opportunity to look at different examples of neglect (Acts 6 verses 1 to 7 and Galatians 2 verses 11 to 14). The questions are simple 

who is being neglected

why were they being neglected 

how was it resolved

Finally - what encouragement do you receive from knowing God addresses neglect?

Some statistics that are shocking from a recent survey:

17% said church members were judgemental of others
12% said church was run by a clique that discouraged involvement

And when people stopped going to church -
16% said nobody contacted me after I left
16% said nobody seemed to care that I left.

Why is church neglect so hurtful?

The meditation ends with a prayer committing the neglect to God and asking him to draw near to you. The reminder is from Psalm 72 verse 12 - God cares for the weak and rescues the one who has no helper.

I'm Being Sinned Against

Psalm 55 verses 12 to 14 "For it is not an enemy who taunts me ... But it is you, a man, my equal, my companion, my familiar friend. We need to take sweet counsel together; within God's house we walked in the throng."

David was in a hard place. He was restless, he moaned, he trembled, he prayed. His days held anguish, terror and horror. He wanted to run away. This was different. This time his enemy was not a pagan army coming against him from outside. His oppressor was his friend. And not just any friend - a close friend, a friend who regularly worshipped with him in God's house. The friend didn't come against him with a fist or a raised voice. Instead he set out to destroy him with sneaky words. He spoke his lies smoothly and softly - no one would have known what he was up to. But verse 21 tells us "war was in his heart." His betrayal was so hurtful that David says he would rather have faced an army. It is hard to be taunted by an army but it is what he expected so it was bearable. It is ot easy to hear insults from an adversary but at least David had the option to walk away - verse 12. But when it is a friend who sins against you? David says that is when he was completely overwhelmed. 

Maybe you have experienced unkindness, gossip, partiality and slander. Maybe you have been the victim of bullying or abuse. Maybe you can say as David did in another psalm "Even my close friend in whom I trusted, who ate my bread, has lifted his heel against me." Psalm 41 verses 1 to 9.

This hurts - even more than being openly attacked by ubelievers - because our fellow church members profess to be changed by Christ and believe his gospel. When they sin against us, their speech may sound graceful, but their actions violate their covenant with God and his people - Psalm 55 verse 20.

David's instinct was to "wander far away" and to "lodge in the wilderness" verse 7. Joining "the throne" verse 14 in God's house is often the last thing you want to do when it is a place where you have been mistreated like David was. The wilderness maybe harsh and lonely, you think, but at least nobody can hurt you there.

But David found 2 comforts in his distress: the Lord's tender care for his people - verse 22 and the Lord's certain justice for wrongdoers - verse 23.

The Lord looks on you with love and will deal with every sin committed against you. Either those sins were laid on Christ and paid for at the cross or they will be judged by God on the last day. Your hurt has not been forgotten.

Now read 2 Samuel 16 verse 5 to 14.

List the ways Shimei sinned against David; if you can, use biblical terms for those sins.

What was Abishai's instinct?

Can you relate?

List the reasons David gives for overlooking Shimei's attack.

Can you apply any of those reasons to your own situation?

DId ignoring Shimei seem to resolve the situation (look at verses 13 and 14)?

How does the frankness of this story encourage you in your experience of hurt?

Reflect - Do you agree with David's assessment that it's easier to be hurt by a known enemy that to be hurt by a friend and fellow believer?

Why is hurt from a Christian friend so damaging?

Pray - tell the Lord about the sins committed against you. If you can, use biblical terms for those sins. Using the words of Psalm 55, ask God to sustain you (verse 18) and to give you justice (verse 19). Ask him to help you trust him (verse 23).

I’m Enduring Difficult Personal Circumstances

Luke 2 verses 36 and 37 “And there was a prophetess, Anna, the daughter of Phanuel, of the tribe of Asher. She was advanced in years, having lived with her husband seven years from when she was a virgin, and then as a widow until she was eighty-four. She did not depart from the temple, worshiping with fasting and prayer night and day.”

Anna was a prophetess from the tribe of Asher – one of the so-called “lost tribes” of Israel’s northern kingdom that had rebelled with Jeroboam and then been conquered by Assyria and sent into exile (1 Kings 12 verses 16 to 21).  She had no immediate family. Her husband had died long ago. She had witnessed the siege of her city and the conquest of the Romans.

This verse paints a picture of a woman who came to worship bearing the weight of personal hardship. Anna sang psalms, listened to scripture and offered prayers alongside people who had social connections, spouses, children, money and the vigour of youth.

The crowds in the temple may have been oblivious to Anna’s difficulties, but the bible doesn’t hurry past her losses. The Lord gives tender attention to the personal circumstances that made it hard for Anna to show up to worship, day after day, for decades.

Sometimes church hurts not because of the church, but because circumstances in our lives increase the difficulty of being with God’s people. An unbelieving spouse or unwanted singleness can provoke grief – especially when we see happy families in other pews. Illness or disability can make participating in worship difficult. Financial difficulties or job loss can convince us don’t belong with people who seem to have their lives together.

Anna spent decades going to worship alone, with a failing body, lacking financial security. The Lord knew this, and he graciously placed her in the right place at the right time to welcome the Messiah (verse 38). In answer to her prayers of many years, the Lord allowed her to see Jesus.

If Christ met Anna in her hardship, he will you in yours.

Read Luke 8 verses 42 to 48

What was the woman’s situation?

What do you think her decision to approach Jesus from behind (verse 44) and to remain hidden (verse 47) tells us about how she was feeling?

If neither the disciples nor the people in the crowd noticed her (verse 45), what does that tell us about her relationship to Jesus’ followers?

How does Jesus respond to her?

How can this story encourage you when you come burdened to church?

Reflect how do personal trials make it difficult to come to worship?

Why is it often hard to be around people who have blessings that we do not?

Pray – tell the Lord about your circumstances. Ask him to help you in your troubles (Psalm 46 verse 1). Thank him for promising to be “near to the brokenhearted and to save the crushed in spirit." (Psalm 34 verse 18)

I’m Observing Congregational Conflict

Philippians 4 verse 2 “I entreat Euodia and I entreat Syntyche to agree in the Lord.”

The congregation at Philippi had obviously been transformed by Christ (Philippians 1 verse 6). They abounded in love (chapter 1 verses 8 to 10). They were consistently obedient to the Lord (chapter 2 verse 12). They were generous, supporting the work of missions whenever they had opportunity (chapter 4 verses 10 to 18). The apostle Paul delighted in them (chapter 1 verses 3 to 5). Philippi was the kind of church anyone would have been happy to join, and everyone would have encouraged their friends to visit.

Except for one thing. The congregation oat Philippi had a problem. For most of them, it wasn’t a personal problem, but it was troubling nevertheless. 2 of their members, Euodia and Syntchye were locked in a feud, and everyone knew it. Scripture doesn’t tell us what the subject of their disagreement was, but the fact that Paul urges them to agree seems to indicate the conflict was a petty one – or at least one with an obvious answer.

It may have started over something trivial, but Paul’s specific attention to it probably means the ongoing conflict was upsetting and wearing down the congregation. When the church gathered for worship or fellowship, they were aware of the tension. Life with irritable people is “a continual dripping of rain” (Proverbs 19 verse 13) and Paul’s earlier instructions to “do all things without grumbling or disputing” (Philippians 2 verse 14) may hint that Euodia and Syntyche’s quarrelsomeness was drawing others into habitual strife.

Maybe in your church too a conflict is ripping people apart. The conflict could involve church members or elders. It could be a matter between 2 individuals or between entire segments of the congregation. It could have begun over a petty matter of personal preference or over a strongly held theological conviction. It may even be a necessary confrontation (see for example Galatians 2 verses 11 and 12). But whatever its dimensions, church conflict is difficult to witness. People may even have left the church as a result, and you may be grieving departed friends while navigating the minefield that remains.

The New Testament epistles, written to first-century churches, include both reports of quarrelling (1 Corinthians 1 verse 11; James 4 verse 1) and warnings against quarrelling (2 Timothy 2 verse 23; Titus 3 verse 9) demonstrating that Philippi was not the only congregation with a conflict problem. Although we ought to “be at peace with one another” (Mark 9 verse 50) in the church, we too often devolve into arguments.

The Lord includes this story to remind us that any church can have conflict and that he is intimately involved in dealing with it when it arises.

Read Numbers 12 verses 1 to 16.

How did Miriam and Aaron create conflict with Moses?

What effect do you think this had in the congregation of Israel?
What does verse 2 (“And the Lord heard it”) tell you about the Lord’s concern for his people when there is conflict?

How did the Lord respond to the conflict?

How does this story encourage you to know that the Lord won’t ignore the conflict in your church?

Reflect – we expect conflict among unbelievers, but it can catch us by surprise when it happens in the church. Why is church conflict so distressing? What effects does it have on the participants who start it, the congregation members who observe it and the unbelievers who may hear of it?

Pray – tell the Lord about the conflict in your church. Lament bad effects it has had on everyone connected to it. Ask him to bless your congregation with unity (Psalm 133).

I’m Grieving Changes

Ezra 3 verse 12 “But many of the priests and Levites and heads of father’s houses, old men who had seen the first house, wept with a loud voice when they saw the foundation of this house being laid.”

The old men may have had aging bodies, but their minds were sharp and their hearts still sought the Lord. They could remember Solomon’s temple (1 Kings 6 verses 1 to 8 and verse 11) as though they had walked through it yesterday. Walls lined with cedar, floors covered in cypress, everything overlaid in gold. Carvings of cherubim and gourds and lions and palm trees and flowers. And most precious of all, the ark of the Lord that had gone with God’s people since their exodus from Egypt. Everyone who remembered it agreed it was a magnificent temple, filled with the Lord’s presence.

But that temple was gone – destroyed by the Babylonians decades ago – and in its place was the bare foundation of a new temple. The old men could already tell this temple wouldn’t compare with the one they remembered from childhood. God’s people no longer had Solomon’s wealth or his workforce. They laboured under threats from their enemies. And, worst of all, they no longer had the ark. As the old men looked at the fresh foundation, they could only weep.

Maybe you have experienced unwanted changes in the place where you worship. Perhaps a pastoral transition or dwindling membership has left you longing for past days when your church was thriving and even unbelievers in the community could see how well it was doing. Or maybe your church has changed its practice – using different music in worship, abandoning its women’s ministry, or closing the doors on a long-standing community outreach. Maybe programs you’ve invested in for years have ceased to exist because no-one is interested in continuing them

It might even feel like you are the only one who mourns the change. Some of the returned exiles wept, but others “shouted aloud for joy” (Ezra 3 verse 12) and “the people could not distinguish the sound of the joyful shout from the sound of the people’s weeping, for the people shouted with a great shout” (verse 13). Your sorrow over what has been lost may not be acknowledged in your congregation. Maybe others don’t remember the past, or maybe they don’t care. Your heart is broken, but nobody hears the sound of your weeping.

The verses of Ezra 3 assure us that the Lord knows the hurt when our labours in the church seems to come to nothing and when the church we remember is not the church we have today. The second temple was a sign of the Lord’s continued faithfulness to his people but he doesn’t tell its story without acknowledging the old men’s grief. And even when the Israelites couldn’t distinguish the sound of weeping, the Lord recorded it in his book.

Seek comfort from the Lord “You have kept count of my tossings; put my tears in your bottle. Are they not in your book?” (Psalm 56 verse 8).

Read Psalm 46.

List the images the psalmist uses for his experience of turmoil and change. Would you describe your experiences in similar ways?

List the images the psalmist uses for God’s unchanging presence.

How is this a comfort to you in times of upheaval?

Who dwells in “the city of God” (verse 4)?

How does this description give you hope for Christ’s church?

Reflect – why is change hard? Why are changes in the church especially painful?

Pray – tell the Lord your sorrow over changes in your church. Thank him for the good things he has done in your church in the past. Ask him to help you trust him for the future: “whoever has despised the day of small things shall rejoice” (Zechariah 4 verse 10).

I’m Being Led by Sinful Shepherds

1 Samuel 1 verse 14 “And Eli said to her, ‘How long will you go on being drunk? Put your wine away from you.”

As much as Hannah loved the Lord, going to worship was difficult. Her great desire was to have a child and the Lord had closed her womb. Her husband’s other wife had children, though and she provoked Hannah about it. Every year, when Hannah went to the place of worship, her pilgrimage ended in tears (1 Samuel 1 verses 1 to 7). One day, she took her sorrow into the temple at Shiloh and poured out her heart before the Lord – her husband’s choice to take another wife, her barren womb, her rival’s unkindness, her husband’s assumption that everything should be fine – surely all of it came out. And in the middle of her prayer, Eli the high priest called out to her from his seat by the door and accused her of being a drunkard.

Eli’s failures as a spiritual shepherd were legion. Hannah had gone “year by year” (verse 7) to Shiloh, and yet Eli didn’t recognise her, let alone have any knowledge of her ongoing grief. Hannah came before the Lord in faith, and yet Eli characterized her prayer as sin-soaked rambling. Hannah was in need – in “great anxiety and vexation” (verse 16) and yet Eli met her with a sharp rebuke.

Eli’s conduct toward the other worshippers wasn’t much better than his treatment of Hannah. He honoured his sons above the Lord and with disregard for the Lord’s people (chapter 2 verse 29). He “kept hearing” how his sons took the people’s offerings for themselves and how they slept with the women who served in the tent of meeting, but scripture only records one ineffective rebuke from him (chapter 2 verses 22 to 25). While his flock suffered, Eli largely did nothing. He was a weak and sinful shepherd.

Maybe you too have had pastors and elders who didn’t listen to you, neglected to care for you, taught error, acted selfishly or even abused you. Or perhaps they failed your whole church by falling into scandalous sin. Maybe the leaders you trusted to point you to Christ were actually “worthless men” who “did not know the Lord” (chapter 2 verse 12). Or they may have been genuine believers who were not qualified to be elders in the first place (Titus 1 verses 5 to 9; 1 Timothy 3 verses 1 to 7; 1 Peter 5 verses 1 to 4) and did much harm by taking an office they couldn’t uphold.

Hannah’s story reminds us that the Lord sees the pain of having shepherds who are not shepherds in the likeness of Christ. When Hannah was in distress, “the Lord remembered her” (1 Samuel 1 verse 19). Her whole story – including her treatment at the hands of a sinful shepherd – was known to the Lord.

Just as the Lord remembered Hannah, he remembers you.

Read – Ezekiel 34 verses 1 to 16.

What charges does the Lord bring against the shepherds of Israel?

What does the Lord say he will do because of their sins?

Does it comfort you to know the Lord sees and brings justice against sinful shepherds?

Why?

Who is the Good Shepherd the Lord promises (see John 10 verse 11)?
List the things the Lord promises to do as the Good Shepherd.

Does it encourage you to know the Lord cares for you in these ways? Why?

Reflect – The Bible’s repeated condemnations of hypocrites and warnings against false teachers make it clear that these are real problems for the church. Why are wolves in sheep’s clothing (Matthew 7 verse 15) so dangerous?

Pray – tell the Lord how you have been hurt by someone who was meant to shepherd your soul. Ask the Lord to be the Good Shepherd to you. Ask him to seek you, rescue you, gather you, feed you, strengthen you, heal you and give you rest (Ezekiel 34 verses 11 to 16).

I’m Being Rejected

John 1 verse 11 “Jesus came to his own and his own people did not receive him.”

It had been 3 long years. After his baptism Jesus had spent 40 days in the wilderness, fasting and being tempted by the devil (Luke 4 verse 1 to 13). And as soon as he returned, he faced more trouble. The citizens of his hometown rejected him – even trying to throw him off a cliff – because he was nothing special in their eyes and they didn’t want to hear what he had to say (Luke 4 verse 16, 22 to 30). The scribes and Pharisees looked for reasons to accuse him (Luke 6 verse 7), the people said he was an agent of Satan (Luke 11 verse 15), a government official beheaded his forerunner in ministry (Matthew 14 verses 3 to 11) and crowds of people followed him just to see what miracle he would do next (Luke 11 verses 16 and 29). At the end, the chief priests, the elders and the high priest concocted a secret plot to arrest and kill him (Matthew 26 verses 3 and 4).

Wherever Jesus went, he had enemies. But he also had friends. A group of men and women – a small congregation of believers – travelled with him, received his teaching and provided for his needs (Luke 8 verses 1 to 3). Even when the Pharisees made accusations and the crowds gathered looking for a spectacle, Jesus’ friends loved him and believed he was who he said he was (John 16 verse 27). For 3 years, they remained by his side.

Until they didn’t.

On the night of his arrest, “all the disciples left him and fled” (Matthew 26 verse 56). During the most difficult hours of his life, Jesus was abandoned, betrayed and rejected by his friends (Matthew 26 verses 47 to 50, 56, 69 to 75). One of his closest disciples even swore up and down that he wasn’t a friend of Jesus at all. With a terse sentence in a dark courtyard, Peter denied the One who was at that moment laying down his life for him: “I do not know the man” (Matthew 26 verse 72, 74).

The Lord doesn’t simply observe people’s hurt. He entered into it. The eternal Son took on human flesh and came to earth, “and his own people did not receive him” (John 1 verse 11). He loved the church (Ephesians 5 verse 25) and yet he was “despised and rejected … a man of sorrow and acquainted with grief” (Isaiah 53 verse 3). In his life and on the cross, Jesus the sinless God-man experienced deeper hurt than any person ever has. And he did it for our sake (verses 4 to 6).

Turn to Jesus.

Read Isaiah 53, one of the great Old Testament prophesies of the coming Messiah.

What images does Isaiah use to describe Jesus’ hurt and rejection?

Can you relate?

How do Christ’s sufferings on your behalf comfort you?

Reflect – the account of Jesus’ last days includes numerous rejections (see Matthew 26). Some came from people who didn’t profess love for Jesus. Others came from Jesus’ friends. As Christians we can face rejection in both the world and the church. In what ways have you experienced rejection among believers? Why is it especially hurtful?

Pray – thank the Lord for sending Jesus to enter into suffering so our sins could be forgiven. Praise him because “he has not despised or abhorred the afflicted, and he has not hidden his face from him, but has heard, when he cried to him. (Psalm 22 verse 24)

SECTION 2 - WHY IS CHURCH SO HARD?

There are 4 fundamental reasons for hurt in the church:

The fall’s effects

Satan’s schemes

Human weakness

Human sin

Your hurt may be caused by just one of these factors, or, more likely a few of them are each contributing in different ways.

I want to help you categorize and understand what lies behind your hurt. In my own life I have found it immensely helpful to distinguish which hard situations are deliberately orchestrated and which are simply the repercussions of a broken world, which actions are malicious and which may arise from someone’s frailty This shines light in hurt’s darkness and enables me to begin to think clearly about how to respond. In any difficult situation, it’s also helpful to remember that there’s more going on than we can perceive with our physical senses – there are spiritual forces at work that affect every aspect of life in the church.

The 4 realities in this section are the same ones that have troubled believers since the Garden of Eden. And for generations, believers have looked in hope to the Messiah, the one who conquers sin and Satan and who makes all things new. Your hurt has a cause and Jesus will triumph over it.

We live in a fallen world

“For we know that the whole creation has been groaning together in the pains of childbirth until now. And not only the creation, but we ourselves, who have the firstfruits of the Spirit, groan inwardly as we wait eagerly for adoption as sons, the redemption of our bodies.” (Romans 8 verses 22 and 23)

The greatest disaster in the history of the world happened right at its very beginning. In the garden, Adam and Eve had everything they could need: beautiful surroundings, delicious food, meaningful work, ideal companionship and an intimate relationship with God (Genesis 2). Then they sinned. Adam and Eve ate the fruit God commanded them not to eat, and nothing in the world has been the same since.

Because of Adam’s fall, every human is born with a sinful nature, is under God’s wrath and curse and is unable to save him or herself. The fall also has implications for creation in general. The penalty for Adam’s sin includes pain, discord, hardship, obstacles, fruitlessness, disappointment and death (Genesis 3 verses 16 to 19). Because of the fall nothing on earth works as smoothly as it did at creation. As today’s verses remind us, the whole world is groaning.

In the church we experience the effects of the fall. Growth can be slow, financial troubles loom, buildings are inadequate (or not to be had), programs never get off the ground, church members get sick or move away or die, and all our sweat on the church’s behalf doesn’t seem to produce much yield. Some of these hardships may be the direct result of a particular person’s sin, but often they are simply the features of life after Eden.

We usually accept the fact that projects in our workplaces sometimes don’t succeed and that our homes fill with dust as soon as we’ve cleaned them, but we don’t always acknowledge that life in the church inevitably includes ordinary difficulties and discouragements. We’d like to think every good effort will always advance smoothly in God’s kingdom, but even the church has to balance the budget and reschedule events. Sometimes the problems we face on Sundays are not because we are in church but because we are in a fallen world.

These verses don’t leave us without hope however. As Paul reminds us, creation’s groaning has an end in view. Like childbirth – which is painful for a time but results in the blessing of new life – our groaning under failed ministries and dwindling resources should focus us on a joyful future. One day soon, Christ will fully and finally redeem this world from the curse and usher in a new creation. For those who look to him in faith, the discouragements of earthly church life will pass away, and we “shall obtain gladness and joy, and sorrow and sighing shall flee away.” (Isaiah 35 verse 10)

Read Isaiah 35

List the images that illustrate the struggles God’s people face in a fallen world.

How are each of those difficulties reversed in the new creation Isaiah describes?

As a result of the fall, what specific difficulties have come on your church?

Imagine how each of those will be restored in eternity.

Reflect - when we are discouraged or hurting, we can be quick to assume our struggles in the church are unique to the church.

Why is it helpful to remember that the fall of Adam has implications for all of creation?

Pray – lament to the Lord the effects of the fall on your church. Thank him for sending Christ into the world. Praise him for promising to bring a new heaven and a new earth.

Satan hates the Church

“Your adversary the devil prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour. Resist him, firm in your faith, knowing that the same kinds of suffering are being experienced by your brotherhood throughout the world.” (1 Peter 5 verses 8 and 9)

The churches in first-century Asia were struggling. Between them, the 7 congregations had to contend with false teachers, poverty, slander, persecution, sexual immorality and spiritual lethargy (Revelation 1 to 3). To help them understand their situation, the Lord gives John a vision. In it, a great red dragon – “with seven heads and ten horns” – mounts an epic attack against a woman and her male child (Revelation 12 verse 3). Eventually the dragon is thrown down to earth. This signals his ultimate defeat, but it also makes him formidable because he has nothing to lose and he knows “his time is short” (verse 12). Furious with his situation, the soon-to-be-destroyed dragon turns against all the children of the woman and goes off to make war on them.

Who are those children? They are “those who keep the commandments of God and hold to the testimony of Jesus” (verse 17). And who is the dragon? He is “that ancient serpent, who is called the devil and Satan” (verse 9).

Sometimes finding an explanation for our church hurt requires us to pull back the curtain on the spiritual realm. And there we see that the dragon is out to get us.

These verses call the Evil One “a roaring lion” and opposing the church is one of his primary activities. He is our “adversary”, he “prowls” and he is “seeking someone to devour”. When church hurts, we should not be blind to the possibility that it is Satan’s doing. Because he hates Christ, the Evil One uses every tool at his disposal to damage, persecute, and destroy Christ’s church. He seeks to spread lies (John 8 verse 44), confuse our doctrine (2 Corinthians 11 verse 3), separate us from Christ (Romans 8 verses 38 and 39), keep us from understanding the preaching of the Word (Matthew 13 verse 19), exploit our anger for his own ends (Ephesians 4 verses 26 and 27), stir up controversy in the church (2 Timothy 2 verses 23 to 26), prevent gospel workers from ministry (1 Thessalonians 2 verses 17 and 18), magnify offenses in order to cause us to sin (2 Corinthians 2 verses 10 and 11), ensnare vulnerable Christians (1 Timothy 3 verse 6) and cause church members to fail to love each other (1 John 3 verse 10). When we are hurt in the church, we can remember that the source of our hurt is often the Evil One who hates “the brotherhood throughout the world”.

Perhaps surprisingly, this truth can also be a comfort. We are not alone. The same attacks that come against us also come against our brothers and sisters in all times and places. And take heart: “He who is in you is greater than he who is in the world” (1 John 4 verse 4).

Read Acts 4 verses 32 to 5 verse 11

How does Luke describe the church in Acts 4 verses 32 to 37?

How does this contrast with the story in chapter 5 verses 1 to 11?

To what does Peter attribute Ananias and Sapphira’s deceitful and self-serving behaviour?

What effect did Satan’s act have on the whole congregation?

In what additional ways do you think the believers in that church may have been hurt by the Evil One’s ploy?

Reflect – why are we often quick to look for temporal explanations and slow to look for spiritual ones?

Why is it important to acknowledge the possibility that Satan is at work in our church situation?

Pray – tell the Lord the ways you see Satan attacking your church. Ask him to have mercy: “Do not lead us into temptation, but deliver us from the evil one” (Matthew 6 verse 13).

People are Weak

“And we urge you, brothers and sisters, admonish the idle, encourage the fainthearted, help the weak, be patient with them all.” (1 Thessalonians 5 verse 14)

On the night of his betrayal, Jesus took his disciples – the small congregation who had supported him in his ministry – to Gethsemane. There he selected 3 of his dearest friends and asked them to pray for him while he withdrew to pray alone (Matthew 26 verses 36 to 39). After an hour, he returned to the group to find them sleeping. And even after he woke them, they fell asleep twice more (verse 40 to 45), When he was in great distress, Jesus’ fellow worshippers repeatedly failed to care for him. Confronting their inertia, though, he diagnosed not malice but frailty: “The Spirit indeed is willing, but the flesh is weak.” (Verse 41)

Sometimes people who hurt us in the church do so out of weakness. We are fallen creatures in a fallen world, and the effects of the curse often hamper our best intentions. In this verse Paul writes to the church at Thessalonica and acknowledges that the church is full of frail people. In every congregation, there are people who sometimes neglect to act (“the idle”), people whose fears and doubts cripple them (“the fainthearted”) and people whose abilities are limited (“the weak”). These vulnerabilities can be complicated by personal sin, but they trace their roots back to the fall’s lingering effects on every human. Knowing this, Paul doesn’t urge a swift rebuke. He urges patience.

Sometimes people in the church act the way they do because they are limited by time or ability, because they lack maturity or knowledge, or because they are beset by physical or mental illness. A congregation member with chronic disease may want to help but be unable to commit in advance. A new believer may quote bible verses at you but lack the wisdom to offer comfort. These are the same kinds of struggles that have affected humans since the fall of Adam. Paul loved the Galatian church but his “bodily ailment” was “a trial” to them (Galatians 4 verses 13 and 14). Nathanael was committed to being honest, but his impulsive words were insulting (John 1 verses 45 to 51). Apollos was zealous, but he was ignorant and taught incorrectly at first (Acts 18 verses 24 to 28). Timothy, Titus, John and others wanted to minister to the saints, but they could only “do their best” and wait for an opportunity (2 Timothy 4 verse 9, 21; see also 1 Timothy 3 verse 14; Titus 3 verse 12; 2 John 1 verse 12; 1 Corinthians 16 verse 12).

When people fail to care for us in the church, it hurts. They may be unavailable in our time of need, or their words and actions may be eager but ill-considered. To understand what’s happening, we can remember that they – like all of us – are weak. This can give us sympathy for them. We can ask for the Spirit’s help to be patient, recognising that God has been patient with us in our weaknesses too (Psalm 103 verses 13 and 14).

Read 1 Corinthians 12 verses 12 to 26

Paul says the church is like a body: it has many parts, and every part is necessary.

How are we connected in the church?

What does Paul say about the weak parts?

Why might that be surprising?

Reflect – it’s easy to look at people’s actions and assume that what they did was exactly what they intended to do. When thy hurt us, then, we often suppose that they wanted to hurt us. How can remembering that we are all weak reshape the way we view others’ words and actions?

Pray – tell the Lord how you have been hurt by weak people. Confess your own weakness in loving others well. As you think ahead to interactions with church members, ask him to help you to “be patient with them all.”

People Sin

“What causes quarrels and what causes fights among you? Is it not this, that your passions are at war within you?” (James 4 verse 1)

When you first become a Christian you may have thought the church was filled with people who were nearly perfect. You may have assumed that they’d always worship wholeheartedly, treat one another kindly, and reach out to unbelievers boldly. It probably didn’t take too many Sundays for you to realise it’s more complicated than that.

The New Testament is honest about problems in the church. In this verse, James addresses the first-century congregations and diagnoses the source of their conflicts. The reason you can’t get along and you keep hurting each other. James writes, is because, even though you’ve been redeemed, you still have sin in your hearts. Although we might like to think people in the church would always act in holy ways, the testimony of scripture is that believers struggle against sin. In Paul’s first letter to the church at Corinth, for example he declared 2 seemingly contradictory truths: the believers were saints (1 Corinthians 1 verse 2) and the believers were sinners (15 verse 34).

When Christ died on the cross, he paid sin’s penalty and he broke sin’s power: Christ gives us new hearts and his indwelling Spirit, so we can say no to sin and yes to righteousness. And yet, in this life, we still battle against sin and frequently fall into it (see Romans 6 and 7).

All around us, our fellow church members are caught in what James calls a “war”. People know they should do one thing, but they often given in to sin and do the opposite. And sin in Christians’ hearts leads to hurt in their churches: “You desire and do not have, so you murder. You covet and cannot obtain, so you fight and quarrel” (James 4 verse 2)

When we experience sin in the church, we should be grieved, but we shouldn’t be surprised.

Being sinned against in the church can feel very personal, but understanding the reality and nature of sin can allow you to see the situation more clearly. The believer who sinned against you has a major conflict raging in his or her own heart (as you do in yours); in the moment of sinning, that Christian lost a skirmish against evil “passions” that were “at war” within.

When we come to church, we are not entering a downtown showroom but a battlefield hospital – an institution designed by God to diagnose and cut out the cancer of sin and to remake all of us in the image of the Son. As any seriously ill person can tell you, living as a patient among other patients isn’t easy; in fact, it’s often extremely painful. But like hospitals, churches are designed for our healing.

Read 1 Corinthians 3 verses 1 – 4, 5 verses 1 and 2, 6 verses 1 to 8, 11 verse 17 to 22

These passages mention just some of the sins that plagued the church at Corinth.

Make a list of the ones you noticed. Does it surprise you that these sins were present in the church?  Why or why not? How is the bible’s honesty about these sins – and Paul’s efforts to address them – a comfort to you?

Reflect – in the reflection under people are weak, we saw that recognising other Christians’ weakness can help us understand that their actions don’t necessarily align with their intentions. How can recognising other believer’s ongoing battle with sin similarly help us understand their conduct?

Pray – lament to God the effects of sin in your church. Confess to him ways you have sinned against others. Ask him to make your church a place that confronts sin and encourages righteousness. Praise him as the God who “forgives iniquity and transgression and sin, but who will by no means clear the guilty” (Exodus 34 verse 7)

SECTION 3 - WHY SHOULD I TRUST GOD WHEN CHURCH HURTS? 

You may have said “I know I should trust God”. But that can feel pretty hollow if you aren’t really sure why you ought to trust him. And to know why you should trust God, you have to know who God is.

Why should I trust God When Church Hurts? Look at 4 truths about who God is and let them give us good reason to rely on him. God is sovereign, powerful, unchanging and loving. Because of this, we can come to him with all our sighs and cast on him all our cares. These truths also counter the hurtful realities we saw in the last section.

Church hurts because of the effects of the fall, but God is sovereign over his whole creation.

Church hurts because Satan wants to destroy us, but God is all-powerful.

Church hurts because people fail, but God is perfectly consistent – always acting according to his holy character.

Church hurts because people sin against us, but God is loving all the time.

God is Sovereign

“Am I in the place of God? … You meant evil against me, but God meant it for good.” Genesis 50 verses 19 and 20

Joseph’s life in the covenant community appeared to be a series of undeserved setbacks and senseless injustices. When he was a teenager, Joseph’s brothers hated him and were jealous of him (Genesis 37 verses 2 to 11). Later they assaulted him and sold him into slavery among the pagans, effectively banishing him from God’s people and cutting him off from fellowship and worship (verses 18 to 28). Because of this, Joseph lived and worked among godless people who mistreated him even further (Genesis 39 and 40).

After many years, the brothers came to Joseph, looking for his help and ultimately for his forgiveness (Genesis 43 and 45, 50 verses 15 to 21). Joseph’s words in today’s verses reveal the truth that sustained him: “God meant it for good”. Tumbled in the relentless waves of sin that came against him, Joseph could only rest on God’s purposeful sovereignty 

Like Joseph, when we are hurt by another believer’s actions or suffer the effects of others’ sin, it can seem like our plans for our lives have come crashing down around us. Difficulty, disappointment and mistreatment in the church all make us feel out of control.  In those seasons, why should we trust God? Joseph reminds us that we can find security in God’s unfailing purposes.

In Psalm 33, the psalmist tells us that God’s rule is over all he has made: the earth fears him and the world’s citizens should be in awe of him (verse 8). Whatever he determines to do he does (verse 9) and nothing and no one can stand in his way (verse 10). What’s more, his sovereign will never falters but remains steadfast from one generation to another (verse 11).

We may not understand why a beloved church member has to move away or why financial difficulties are facing the church to let a dear pastor go. We can’t make sense out of the seemingly petty miscommunication that led to a church split or the reason that our adult children stopped attending. We aren’t able to bring any good from our hurt and disappointment. But the Lord can.

When circumstances in the church make us feel out of control, we know the One who is in control. God rules over every detail of his creation and executes his plans perfectly. His good purposes are being accomplished even now. This means that we can trust him with every situation – even the hard ones. Our Lord’s counsel stands forever.

Read 1 Peter 1 verses 6 and 7

What is troubling these churches?

How does it encourage you to know that trials are “for a little while” and “if necessary”?

What does Peter say are God’s purposes in trials?

Reflect – John Piper said “God is always doing 10,000 things in your life and you may be aware of 3 of them.”

When church hurts, how does it encourage you to remember that God has purposes in your life (and in the lives of your fellow church members) that you don’t even know about?

Pray – cry out to the Lord in your hurt and disappointment. Ask him to remind you of his sovereign care over all he has made. Ask him to remind you of his sovereign care for you in the past. Ask him to send his Spirit to help you to trust his sovereign purposes now. Praise him that he designs your hard circumstances to display “the tested genuineness of your faith – more precious than gold that perishes.” (1 Peter 1 verse 7)

God is Powerful

“Who is like you, O Lord, among the gods? Who is like you, majestic in holiness, awesome in glorious deeds, doing wonders? You stretched out your right hand; the earth swallowed them. You have led in your steadfast love the people whom you have redeemed; you have guided them by your strength to your holy abode.” (Exodus 15 verses 11 to 13

The congregation of Israel was in trouble. For generations, they had been oppressed. By government order, the Egyptians beat the Israelites, killed their infant sons, and “made their lies bitter” (Exodus 1 verse 14). Faced with persecution from the outside, some Israelites courageously united in their refusal to act wickedly (verses 15 to 22), but others allowed internal conflicts to divide them (chapter 2 verses 11 to 14). During “those many days” the congregation cried out to God for help (verse 23). Then, Moses wrote, “God saw the people of Israel – and God knew” (verse 25).

When our own congregations are in trouble – whether through outside attacks or internal strife – we feel vulnerable. We know we can’t solve the complex problems that make our church lives bitter. On our own, we’re powerless to reclaim departing church members, reignite the faith of the lukewarm, reconcile the disagreements of onetime friends, or defend against the tactics of a godless society. Like the Israelites in Egypt, we need help.

Thankfully, though we are weak, the God to whom we turn is powerful. The Lord rescued Israel from the clutches of Egypt and overcame their grumbling and mistrust (see Exodus 5 verses 20 to 23).

As our verses remind us, he was able to do this because he is unlike any other. Singing on the far side of the Red Sea, the Israelites rejoiced in the evidence of God’s power. With a flick of his right hand, the earth swallowed his people’s enemies. With his strength, he led a congregation prone to infighting toward the place of his holy presence and gave them a song to sing together. With his love, he redeemed sinners to be his own. The Lord is “majestic in holiness, awesome in glorious deeds, doing wonders.” (verse 11)

Evidence of God’s power is right in front of us too. He has delivered us from our greatest enemy: Satan. By his might, he rescued us from sin’s enslavement through Christ’s powerful work on the cross. Like the Israelites who amassed evidence of God’s past mighty work to give them hope for the future (Exodus 12 verses 17 and 18), we can take courage from what the Lord has already done for us in Christ.

God can reconcile feuding church members. He can convict sinning elders. He can bring new life to a dying congregation. He can heal wounds. He can give spiritual boldness. Look to God for help. If he is powerful enough to deliver souls from eternal death, he is powerful in whatever situation your church faces today.

Read Exodus 15 verses 1 to 21

List all the phrases and images that describe God’s power.

In what ways has God acted powerfully on your behalf in the past?

Verses 17 and 18 of the Israelites’ song look ahead to the future. How does reflecting on God’s power displayed in the past give you courage for the future?

Reflect – why does hurt in the church often make us feel vulnerable?

What are some situations in your church right now that you are powerless to change?

Meditate on the bible’s testimony that our mighty God is able to redeem (Exodus 15 verse 13), reconcile (Ephesians 2 verses 14 to 16), restore (Joel 2 verse 25) and renew (Ezekiel 36 verse 26).

Pray – confess to the Lord that you feel helpless in the face of your church’s situation. Tell him about the attacks from outside and the struggles within. Ask him to act in his power.

God Never Changes

“Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of lights, with whom there is no variation or shadow due to change.” (James 1 verse 17)

When church is hard, it can feel like everything is shifting around us. The churches James was writing to were “the twelve tribes in the Dispersion” (chapter 1 verse 1). These first-century congregations had been persecuted, displaced and scattered. They likely knew the pain of showing up Sunday to discover empty seats and friends gone missing. They knew the turmoil of losing pastors and elders and of sensing hostility toward the church from family and neighbours. They knew how hard it is to settle into a new church in a new place.

Trouble or changes in the church can cause us to question whether anything is solid and trust worthy. If pastors and friends come and go, what can we count on? If the church regularly faces trials of various kinds (chapter 1 verse 2), what can we expect for the future? James points us to a sure resting place in the midst of unsettling circumstances. Unlike the shifting shadows we see around us, our God is the same forever; with him “there is no variation or shadow due to change.”

This means God is always at work in his church in both calm and hard times. The same God who “arranged the members in the body, each one of them as he chose” (1 Corinthians 12 verse 18) continues to set people in particular churches. The same God who gave shepherds and teachers to equip the saints (Ephesians 4 verses 11 and 12) continues to provide pastors and elders for us today. The same God who created the church as the testimony of his glory in the world (Ephesians 3 verses 9 to 11) continues to draw sinners to himself through the ministry of local congregations. The same God who appointed the church to send out gospel labourers into spiritually dark places (Matthew 28 verses 18 to 20) continues to establish new churches where Christ is proclaimed. The same God who appointed Christ as the great shepherd who nurtures, leads and protects the flock (Hebrews 13 verse 20) is the God who promises that “Jesus Christ is the same yesterday and today and forever.” (Hebrews 13 verse 8)

Why can we trust God when church hurts?

Because our God never changes.

Read Psalm 90. What images does the psalmist use to describe God’s constancy? What images does he use to illustrate human changeableness?

Why is the psalmist able to rejoice at the end of the psalm (verses 12 to 17)?

How do the truths in this psalm encourage you?

Reflect – do you have a favourite movie or book that you enjoy over and over, even though you know exactly how the story turns out?

Why are familiarity and consistency a comfort?

What can you do this week to grow in your knowledge of God so that his constant character will be more familiar to you?

Pray – praise the Lord because he does not change. Confess to him the ways that you have failed to trust him in your church situation. Ask him to help you rest on him as the one who is “the same yesterday, today and forever” (Hebrews 13 verse 8).

God is Loving

“For this reason I bow my knees before the Father … (so that you) may have strength to comprehend with all the saints what is the breadth and length and height and depth and to know the love of Christ that surpasses knowledge, that you may be filled with all the fulness of God.” (Ephesians 3 verse 14, 18 and 19)

Church planting in Ephesus was rocky. When Paul first arrived, he found 12 believers and spent a few months preaching in the synagogue (Acts 19 verses 1 to 8).  So far, so good. But then slanderers forced the church to find a new meeting location (verse 9). Later 7 false prophets co-opted the name of Christ in order to perform exorcisms – ending in their spectacular disgrace (verses 13 to 16). Then an idol maker stirred up the whole city to riot against the church (verses 23 to 41).

At the end of 3 years, Paul left Ephesus. He gathered the church elders and warned them, “After my departure fierce wolves will come in among you, not sparing the flock; and from among your own selves will arise men speaking twisted things, to draw away the disciples after them.” (Acts 20 verses 29 and 30). We can imagine them sighing – ‘we’ve faced slanderers, opportunists and rioters and now we’re going to have wolves and traitors too?’

These verses come from Paul’s letter to the church at Ephesus, written sometime after he left. Doubtless, by then they’d endured additional opposition from within and without. Doubtless they were looking for encouragement from their beloved former pastor. Writing to a beleaguered congregation in a pagan city, Paul says he wants the church to know God’s love. And in our own congregational troubles, that’s what we need to know too.

We see in these verses that God’s love for us in Christ has expansive dimensions – it stretches in every direction so far that we need “strength to comprehend” it. In the same breath that Paul tells them he wants them to comprehend the greatness of God’s love, he tells them it actually “surpasses knowledge.” God’s love is more than our minds can grasp. God’s love also has a vast object: “All the saints.” The love of God in Christ is poured out on his whole church – all his people, at every time, in every place. Every one of God’s acts is always for our good.

When you face wolves and traitors and all kinds of difficulty in the church, you can rest secure. If a congregation member speaks unkindly to you, you can remember that God is always loving. If you are tired of going to church alone, you can take hold of the God who cares for you. If the future of your church looks uncertain, you can call on God to have compassion.

The Lord’s love for his church is greater than we can imagine. The One who loved his church so much that he died for her (Ephesians 5 verses 25 to 27) will not abandon us now.

Read Lamentations 3 verses 31 to 33

When we are hurt, we must remember that, unlike fallen creatures, God never treats us carelessly or unlovingly.

All of God’s thoughts toward us are always loving all the time, even when he sends trials.

How have you experienced God’s love in the midst of past afflictions?

How do these verses encourage you in your current church struggles?

Reflect – which of the truths we have considered about God’s character (sovereignty, power, unchangeableness, love) is particularly precious to you in your current situation?  Where do you see that truth expressed in scripture? Where do you see that truth expressed in scripture? How have you experienced it in your life? In what ways can meditating on the other truths also deepen your trust in the Lord?

Pray – ask the Lord to give you “strength to comprehend with all the saints what is the breadth and length and height and depth and to know the love of Christ that surpasses knowledge” (Ephesians 3 verses 18 and 19).

SECTION 4 - WHAT CAN I DO?

What happens now? Have you asked this sitting in the church car park after a hard Sunday? When the congregational meeting blows up or a dear friend lashes out, it’s overwhelming. When you’re hurt, it’s not easy to choose your next steps.

Whatever your situation, scripture gives direction for how to respond in a way that honours the Lord. You can start by being sad – expressing your sorrow in words or tears or simply a silent acknowledgement of the grief you feel. You even can do that while you are still in the car after church. Eventually as you are ready, you can take other steps: pray, get counsel, make a decision about your future in your church.

Remember: Satan is both a liar and a lion. He doesn’t care that you’re hurting; in fact, he sees your hurt as his opportunity. He wants to trick you into leaving the safe paths laid out by the Lord, and then he wants to destroy you.

Express sorrow

“And at the evening sacrifice I rose from my fasting, with my garment and my cloak torn and fell upon my knees and spread out my hands to the Lord my God saying, ‘O my God, I am ashamed and blush to lift my face to you, my God, for our iniquities have risen higher than our heads.” (Ezra 9 verses 5 and 6)

After a 4 month journey, Ezra and the exiles arrived in Jerusalem (Ezra 7 verses 8 and 9). At long last, they sacrificed to God in the place of his presence with the exiles who had returned before (chapter 8 verse 35). What a joy finally to be reunited with God’s people in worship! But their excitement was short-lived. As son as the worship service was over, the leaders already living in Jerusalem approached Ezra with heart-wrenching news. The earlier group of exiles may have settled back in the land, but they had failed to obey God. Rather than separating from their pagan neighbours, the Israelites – including the priests and Levites – had married idol worshippers (chapter 9 verses 1 and 2). Having risked everything to escape the idolatry of Babylon, Ezra found the same sins rampant in the congregation of God’s people.

What Ezra did next shows us how we can respond when sin comes to light in our own congregations. Ezra immediately (“as soon as I heard this” verse 3) began to mourn. He tore his garments and pulled out his hair, adopting the culturally recognised markers of deep grief. Other faithful members of the congregation – “all who trembled at the words of the God of Israel” (verse 4) – mourned alongside him. For hours, he “sat appalled” (verse 3, 4), overwhelmed by the wickedness among people who were meant to be holy.

In the evening, Ezra took his grief to the Lord. He fell on his knees, spread out his hands and prayed with “weeping and casting himself down before the house of God” (chapter 10 verse 1). He confessed the sin of God’s people, unflinchingly describing their “evil deeds and … great guilt” (chapter 9 verse 13) and acknowledging the Lord’s perfect right to be angry with them (verse 14). As he prayed, many others joined him, and they all wept together (chapter 10 verse 1).

When we, like Ezra, encounter sin and hurt in the church, it’s right that we grieve. If a pastor’s scandalous sin is exposed, if church members incite disunity, if the weak in the church are neglected, if professing believers depart from Christ – we should sit appalled as soon as we hear of it. In the same way that we would immediately mourn the death of a loved one, we ought to mourn the loss of righteousness among God’s people. And as we mourn, we should pray, expressing our sorrow to the God who hears and cares, the God of justice and the God of mercy.

Read Ezra 9 verses 6 to 15

What words and phrases does Ezra use for sin?

How does his language affirm the horror of lawlessness?

Why does the Lord’s kindness to his people in redeeming them from exile (verses 8 and 9) make it all the more appalling that they would then disobey him (verses 13 and 14)?

How have we been redeemed by the Lord?

Why is it therefore particularly grievous when Christians sin?

Reflect – is sorrow your first response when you hear of sin or experience the effects of sin in your church body? Why or why not? The next time you find out about some unrighteousness in your congregation, take time as soon as possible to be appalled, to mourn, and to pray.

Pray – come before the Lord with the words of Ezra: “O my God, I am ashamed and blush to lift my face to you, my God, for our iniquities have risen higher than our heads.” (verse 6)

Beware Bitterness

“Be angry and do not sin; do not let the sun go down on your anger, and give no opportunity to the devil … Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamour and slander be put away from you, along with all malice.” (Ephesians 4 verses 26 and 27, 31)

When church hurts, it can be easy to think the hard situation is our “one bad thing to get” and relax our vigilance against other threats. The lingering church conflict, wandering church member, or abdicating church leader consumes all our attention and we forget that sin is crouching at other doors too. Like a lion, Satan would like nothing better than to pounce on the wounded and unguarded members of the flock to bring them down when they least expect it (1 Peter 5 verse 8). These verses warn us that the devil is looking for an opening and he’ll gladly exploit trouble in our churches in order to incite sin in our hearts, Knowing this, we must beware.

In hard church circumstances, we may be angry, but we cannot allow our anger to become sinful and bitter. Paul warns us that such anger is an opportunity for the devil to lead us into further sin and ultimately to destruction. Instead, we must submit our hearts to the Lord and ask for his help. The devil would like us to throw off all restraint; the Lord calls us to resist bitterness and imitate him (verse 32), navigating the precarious line between “be angry” and “do not sin”.

Each hurt and doubt and conflict in the church is part of Satan’s relentless war against the children of God (Revelation 12 verse 17). When we surrender to bitterness, we allow the devil a double triumph; not only has he sown trouble in the congregation, he’s also used that turmoil to provoke sin in our hearts. But thanks be to God, Satan does not have the last word over us. Through the power of Christ’s blood and the help of the Holy Spirit, we can “resist the devil, and he will flee” (James 4 verse 7).

Read Genesis 4 verses 1 to 16

How did Cain respond to the Lord’s correction of his improper worship?

What did the Lord warn him was happening (verse 7)?

What was the result when Cain failed to heed the Lord’s warning?

Where is sin “crouching at the door” in your own responses to situations in the church?

Reflect – Puritan Thomas Brooks wrote “Sin gives Satan a power over us, and an advantage to accuse us and to lay claim to us, as those that wear his badge.” In the midst of church hurt, remember that Satan doesn’t care that you are weak and suffering. In fact, he sees it as his opportunity. He wants you to sin so he can have a reason to accuse you and power to tempt you further. Beware!

Pray – tell the Lord about the ways you are being tempted to bitterness in your current situation. Confess the times you have already fallen into sin. Ask him to forgive you, to keep you from temptation, and to enable you to stand firm when you are tempted (Matthew 6 verses 12 and 13). Praise him for triumphing over sin and Satan (Colossians 2 verse 15).

CONFESS SIN

“Let your ear be attentive and your ears open, to hear the prayer of your servant that I now pray before you day and night for the people of Israel your servants, confessing the sins of the people of Israel, which we have sinned against you. Even I and my father’s house have sinned.” (Nehemiah 1 verse 6)

Nehemiah was eager to hear how God’s people in Jerusalem were doing. As soon s his brother Hanani arrived at his house, Nehemiah asked him for a full report about the congregation. Sadly, the news was not good. The people, Hanani said, were “in great trouble and shame” (Nehemiah 1 verse 3). Their gathering place was in ruins (chapter 2 verse 3) and they were the constant butt of their neighbours’ scorn (verse 17). Seemingly nothing was going well for them.

When our own congregations seem to be in ruins – when spiritual zeal ebbs, when members depart, when our unbelieving neighbours think the church is a joke or threat – we can look to Nehemiah to learn what to do. And his response may surprise us. This verse tells us that when Nehemiah heard that God’s people were ashamed and brought low, his first act was to confess sin. He confessed his own sin: “Even I and my father’s house have sinned.” Although Nehemiah was living far from Jerusalem, he didn’t assume anyone was blameless. Whenever the church is in trouble, we should examine our hearts and see if there is any transgression we ought to confess to the Lord.

Not every hardship is a result of specific sin, of course. Jesus reminded us that sometimes trials come on people simply so God’s mysterious purposes may be accomplished (John 9 verses 1 to 3). But other times, our sins do have direct consequences in the church The Lord warned the congregation at Thyatira that they would face trouble if they continued to tolerate sin, and members of the  Corinthian church even died because of their failure to worship rightly (Revelation 2 verses 20 to 23; 1 Corinthians 11 verses 29 to 31). Although we may not know in very instance whether a particular sin has brought god’s fatherly chastisement (Hebrews 12 verse 5 to 11) on our congregation we do not know that we each sin daily and continually stand in need of Christ’s cleaning blood When the church is in trouble, confessing our own sin brings us into a possture of humble dependence on God and allows us to take further ction with a celar conscience before the Lord.

Ultimately our confession is a hopeful act. Nehemiah asked God to have an attentive ear and an open eye, confident that Yahweh was ready to forgive those who confess. We too can come boldly to the throne of grace, knowing our Lord has promised that “if we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.” (1 John 1 verse 9)

Read Ezra 10 verses 1 to 11

What was the sin of the congregation?

How did they respond?

What can we learn from the fact that the women and children assembled too?

Why were the people trembling (verse 9)?

What does this tell us about their attitude toward their sin?

Reflect – Romans 3 reminds us “none is righteous, no, not one” (verse 10) and “all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God” (verse 23). When trouble comes on our church, why is it important to acknowledge our own sin?

Pray – cry out to the Lord, telling him that your church “is in great trouble and shame” (Nehemiah 1 verse 3). Confess “we have sinned against you” and “even I ... have sinned” (verse 6). Ask him to “grant mercy” (verse 11).

Beware Self-Righteousness

“Two men went up into the temple to pray, one a Pharisee and the other a tax collector. The Pharisee, standing by himself, prayed thus: “God I thank you that I am not like other men, extortioners, unjust, adulterers, or even like this tax collector. I fast twice a week; I give tithes of all that I get.” But the tax collector, standing far off, would not even lift up his eyes to heaven, but beat his breast, saying, “God be merciful to me, a sinner!” I tell you this man went down to his house justified, rather than the other. For everyone who exalts himself will be humbled, but the one who humbles himself will be exalted.” (Luke 18 verses 10 to 14)

In his classic book, Precious Remedies against Satan’s Devices, Thomas Brooks lists several “devices” Satan uses to draw us to sin. “Satan” he explains, “being fallen from light to darkness, from felicity to misery, from heaven to hell, from an angel to a devil, is so full of malice and envy that he will leave no means unattempted, whereby he may make all others eternally miserable with himself.” One of his chief tools to create misery is causing Christians to “be frequent in comparing themselves or their ways with those that are reputed or reported to be worse than themselves.” Satan likes nothing better than to encourage you to be self-righteous.

Especially when we are feeling hurt in the church, the Evil One has plenty of these opportunities. It’s all too easy for him to nudge us to create a mental score sheet of the ways people have hurt us or to be consumed with the obvious wrongdoings of others – and to judge ourselves not so bad by comparison. This was the devilish device that felled the Pharisee in today’s verses. When he came to worship, his eyes darted around to others with a public record of sin. The tax collector, in particular became the object of the Pharisee’s scorn and the grounds for his pride.

The Pharisee wasn’t wrong about the tax collector. This was a man who had taken advantage and hurt others, and he may have even stolen from the Pharisee (After all the Pharisee immediately recognised him!). The Pharisee wasn’t wrong about the tax collector, but he was wrong about himself. As he looked around rather than looking to the Lord, the Pharisee measured himself against the actions of others and failed to see his own sin. By convincing the Pharisee he didn’t need forgiveness, Satan neatly cut him off from the Lord’s tender mercy. The tax collector, and not the Pharisee, went home justified – washed in the blood of the Son, reconciled to the Father, and securely held by the Spirit.

When we feel hurt, it can be tempting to become self-righteous. Muddled by Satan, we don’ see our need of a Saviour and we justify ourselves by looking at others’ wicked actions. But Christ offers a better vision, warning us against falling prey to Satan’s devices and showing us that the joy of true justification comes only by way of humility.

Read Matthew 7 verses 1 to 5

What does Jesus mean by a “speck” and a “log”?

Why are we often more attentive to others’ specks than our own logs?

How does church hurt exacerbate this?

Reflect – Thomas Brooks warns that Satan would have us be “quick-sighted abroad and blind at home”. In what ways are you poised to see the sins of others? Where might you be blind to your own? How does this device aid Satan’s aim for your soul?

Pray – pray the tax collector’s words: “God be merciful to me a sinner!”

Trust the Lord

“If it had not been the Lord who was on our side – let Israel now say – if it had not been the Lord who was on our side when people rose up against us, then they would have swallowed us up alive.” (Psalm 124 verses 1 to 3)

The Psalms of Ascent (120 to 134) are a songbook for going to worship. These are the psalms Israelites sang as they journeyed to Jerusalem for the prescribed feasts and sacrifices. These verses come from Psalm 124 and acknowledge that God’s people sometimes go up to worship with a heavy heart. In David’s psalm, the travelling worshippers were a bedraggled bunch. They faced an onslaught of anger from their enemies. To the faithful men and women on the road to Jerusalem, it felt like a raging flood (verses 4 and 5), the teeth of a wild beast (verse 6) and the snare of a hunter (verse 7) all at once it seemed like attacks were coming from every side.

But just when the flood was going over their heads, the jaws were snapping shut, and the trap was about to spring, help arrived! “The Lord, who made heaven and earth” (verse 8) came to his people’s aid. With these words, the singers affirm that God is sovereign. He is the creator of all things and therefore all things are under his command. Twice they marvel at what would have happened “if it had not been the Lord who was on our side” (verses 1 and 2), declaring that God is unfailingly good. The Lord who had made a covenant with them and their fathers before them was the one who came alongside them to rescue them from trouble. And so, as they walked the difficult road to the place of worship, they sang

When church hurts and we ask ourselves, What can I do? Psalm 124 provides an answer. Like God’s people of old, we can trust the Lord. We can call to mind who he is and then place our confidence in him, believing that he will do what is right In this world – and even on the way to worship – we may face opposition, but we need not fear because the Lord is on our side.

Read Psalm 121

A song of ascents. What are the singers of this psalm looking for (verse 1)?

List the truths about od in this psalm that comforted the worshippers on their way to Jerusalem.

How can those truths encourage you as you go to worship?

Reflect – how do you spend the time on your way to church on Sunday?

Consider whether you could sin, read scripture or pray during those moments.

Write down a song or passage of scripture for next Sunday that would remind you of God’s sovereignty and goodness and that would encourage you to trust God even when going to church is hard.

Pray – use the language of Psalm 124. Tell the Lord about your church situation; the enemies of god who oppose you, the anger you face from others, the flood of trouble that threatens to overwhelm you, and the temptations to sin that wait for you like baited traps. Praise him as your Creator and Helper. Ask him to help you trust that he is on your side to deliver you from evil.

Beware Doubt

“Count it all joy, my brothers and sisters, when you meet trials of various kinds, for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness ... If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask God, who gives generously to all without reproach, and it will be given him. But let him ask in faith, with no doubting, for the one who doubts is like a wave of the sea that is driven and tossed by the wind for that person must not suppose that he will receive anything from the Lord; he is a double-minded man, unstable in all his ways. “ (James 1 verses 2 and 3, 5 to 8)

The first believers who experienced doubt came from a small congregation. Things were actually going along just fine; the congregation members worked hard, had fellowship with each other and worshipped God together. But Satan had other plans. Approaching one of the members, he asked her the question that lives in infamy: “Did God actually say, ‘You shall not eat of any tree in the garden?'" (Genesis 3 verse 1). By his query, and his crafty follow-ups, Satan planted seeds of doubt in the woman’s mind and heart. Does God speak truth? Does God do what’s best? Is God god? The woman’s doubt made her waver, and she gave in to sin – with disastrous effects.

If Satan saw an opportunity to sow doubt in Eve – whose congregation of worshippers had everything good and beautiful it could ever need (Genesis 2 verses 8 to 10) – how much more will he see a chance in us when our hearts and churches are struggling?

You may be wondering, How could the Lord allow me to keep going to church year after year without my spouse and children? How could God allow me to be sinned against by my elders? How could the Lord allow me to be sinned against by my elders? How could the Lord allow our congregation to see so little fruit? In the midst of your hurt, Satan is ready to incite doubt: Is God actually trustworthy?

James knows this and in these verses he tells us 3 things:

First he explains why the Lord allows us to experience hardship. Our “various trials” are intended by a good God to increase our faith and make us steadfast. When we are weakened by suffering, we can be strong, because we have arrived at a place where we have no option except to cast ourselves on the Lord’s strength (2 Corinthians 12 verse 7 to 10).

Second, James tells us what to do in trials. We should “ask God ... in faith” for the wisdom to navigate them well. If our trials are to produce spiritual fruit in us, we need the help of our sovereign and good God.

Third, James tells us what to beware of: doubt when we doubt God, we become “double-minded” and “unstable” , an easy target for Satan’s schemes and the world’s lies. Instead we must come to God in faith – believing that he is who he says he is and that he cares for those who trust him (Hebrews 11 verse 6).

Read Hebrews 11

List some of the difficulties God’s people navigated by faith.

How does their example encourage you to beware of doubt and to cling to the Lord?

How might God use your steadfastness in your current trials to encourage others?

Reflect – it’s become popular to asset that doubt is an inevitable – even admirable – part of faith The testimony of scripture, however, is that while doubts may plague believers, doubts are never to be indulged. What do these verses show you about the nature of doubt?

Pray - tell the Lord about a situation where Satan is provoking doubt in your heart. Using the words of the verses, ask him to give you wisdom and steadfast faith in him.

Seek Help From God

“I waited patiently for the Lord, he inclined to me and heard my cry. (Psalm 40 verse 1

When the church seems like it’s on the brink of collapse – whether from trouble without or within – we must seek help from the Lord.

In Psalm 40, where we find this verse, David too was beset by “evils ... beyond number” (verse 12). He was overwhelmed by his own sin: “my iniquities have overtaken me” (verse 12). He had also been sinned against by others: “(those) who seek to snatch away from my life ... who delight in my hurt!” verse 14). The “miry bog” (verse 2) that sucked at David’s life was – like many messy situations in our own lives – partly of his own making and partly others’ fault. And like Esther, David knew his only hope was in crying out to God (verse 1).

David knew and trusted God (“you are my help and my deliverer” verse 17) and so he sought the Lord’s help in his troubles. He asked the Lord to rescue him both from his own sin and from the devices of others. Although he asked the Lord to “make haste” (verse 13), he knew God’s answer might not be immediate. He “waited patiently” trusting that the Lord would hear and act at just the right time. In our own hardship in the church, we can learn from David’s persistent cry to God for help. If we are caught in sin or being sinned against, if we are perilously close to a “pit of destruction” (verse 2), we should ask the Lord for wisdom (verse 4), sanctification (verse 8), forgiveness (verse 11), deliverance (verse 13), justice (verse 14), and comfort (verse 17). Perhaps surprisingly, we can also ask him for joy (verse 16).

Psalm 40 shows us that crying out to God is not only good for us, it’s also good for the other members of our congregation , giving us an opportunity to testify of God’s goodness before them. When the Lord didn’t restrain his mercy from David (verse 11). David didn’t restrain his lips from praising the Lord verse 9). In this way, our difficulties in the church can become a blessing to the church as call on “the great congregation” to behold with us the steadfast love and faithfulness of our God (verse 10).

Read Psalm 40

What truths about God’s character does David affirm?

What other truths about God could you add from other parts of scripture?

How does knowing these things encourage you to cry out to him?

Reflect – Esther and the people of God sought the Lord with prayer and fasting. They refrained from eating and drinking in order to wean themselves from the temporary comforts of this world, to remind themselves of their dependence on God and to orient their hearts and schedules toward seeking his mercy. Consider fasting about your own hard chuck situation, either on your own or with a group of church members.

Pray – using the words of Psalm 40, tell the Lord about the “miry bog” that has you trapped today (verse 2). Confess your own sins (verse 12). Lament the times you have been sinned against (verses 14 and 15). Cry to the Lord: “make haste to help me!!” (verse 13). Commit to one day telling others about the ways he delivered you (verse 9).

Beware Pride

“Blessed is the man who makes the Lord his trust, who does not turn to the proud, to those who go astray after a lie!” (Psalm 40 verse 4)

In Psalm 40 we see that David acknowledges the danger of relying on ourselves – the danger of pride – when we are struggling.

When we are feeling hurt in church, Satan is ready to cut us off from the source of true help – the Lord – and deceive us into trusting ourselves and our own judgements. The situation in our congregation may seem abundantly clear to us. We may think we know who is right and who is wrong, we may think we know exactly what needs to be done next, and we can assume we are the perfect people to do it. But Psalm 40 urges us to avoid the devil’s trap The one who doesn’t indulge his pride but who “makes the Lord his trust” is blessed.

Especially when we have been sinned against, we often want justice immediately and can take matters into our own hands, no matter what we might need to compromise. Pride encourages us to pursue speedy results for ourselves in any way possible, but David received true deliverance when he “waited patiently for the Lord” (verse 1) . Being hurt can also cause us to feel vulnerable, and so w may be tempted to rely on “the proud” – on those who have obvious power and ability in this world – even if they lead us astray. Following ungodly advice from ungodly people may seem empowering but Scripture tells us it’s the path of misery (Proverbs 14 verse 12; 16 verse 25).

As David knew, blessing comes from seeking the Lord and delight comes from following his Word (Psalm 40 verse 8). We can come to him in prayer, admitting our weakness and asking him for his wisdom. We can confess the ways we’ve thought much of ourselves and our own plans. We can read his Word and submit ourselves to his revealed will. We can look for godly men and women and ask for their wise counsel. We can ask for his help to resist Satan’s temptations to “go astray after a lie”. When church hurts, we can’t afford to trust in ourselves.

Read Isaiah 31 verses 1 to 5

What is the problem with relying on ourselves and on those who seem to have power in this world? Where is our true help found?

Reflect – Romans 12 verse 16 warns us “Never be wise in your own sight”. Why is pride dangerous? Why is it tempting? Write this verse out and put it somewhere where you often see it.

Pray – confess the way you have fallen into the trap of pride in your current situation – thinking you know exactly what is happening and what should be done. Ask the Lord to forgive you and to help you trust him rather than yourself.

Seek Help from wise Counselors

“Where there is no guidance, a people falls, but in an abundance of counsellors there is safety.” (Proverbs 11 verse 14)

When God’s people left Egypt, they brought their livestock and their sin with them. They had conflicts over property, conflicts over relationships, conflicts over inheritances, conflicts over contracts, conflicts over petty crimes, conflicts over major injustices, There were so many disputes in the assembly that Moses had to hear cases all day every day (Exodus 18 verses 13 to 16). In fact, after dispensing all that counsel, Moses needed counsel himself (verses 17 to 23)! A congregation of 2 million members produces a lot of strife.

To help his people, the Lord provided wise counsellors - “men who fear God, who are trustworthy and hate a bribe” – to solve disputes and to enable the congregation members to “go to their place in peace” (verses 21 and 23).

Just like the people of Israel, God’s people today need counsel in the midst of conflicts and hurt. This verse shows us we often make poor decisions on our own. Swayed by our own desires and our limited perspective and wisdom, we often choose the wrong course of action, which can lead to harm. Instead we need the help of others to know how to proceed.

When we are hurt in the church, usually our best counsellors will be the elders of the church. Those are the men God has appointed and who display the wisdom and grace needed to shepherd God’s people in the church (Titus 1 verse 5 to 9). Your pastors and elders are tasked by God with keeping watch over your soul (Hebrews 13 verse 17); don’t be reluctant to ask them for help.

But if the elders of your own church are part of the problem, seek counsel from other mature believers or elders in another church, when the dispute over circumcision couldn’t be solved locally. Paul and Barnabas called on apostles and elders from throughout the region to help them (Acts 15 verse 1 to 35). Sometimes we too may have to get help from outside our congregation.

Ultimately, we should look for counsellors who display godly (not worldly) wisdom. Scripture tells us this wisdom is “first pure, then peaceable, gentle, open to reason, full of mercy and good fruits, impartial and sincere” (James 3 verse 17). When church hurts, this kind of counsel from mature believers is one of God’s tools to shepherd our hearts away from danger and toward healing.

Read Numbers 27 verses 1 to 11

What was the problem the daughters of Zelophehad had?

To whom did they go for help?

What was the result?

How did the women serve God’s people in the future by bringing their case to the elders?

How might your own situation – and the future of your church – be helped by our getting wise counsel?

Reflect – it’s vital to choose wise and godly people as counsellors. Although it might feel satisfying to seek advice from someone who immediately takes our side. Moses looked for “men who fear God, who are trustworthy and hate a bribe” (Exodus 18 verse 21). Think of 2 or 3 people you know who love the Lord, know his Word, seek him by prayer, live Christlike lives, avoid partiality and are respected by other believers. Consider asking them to help you think through your situation.

Pray – ask the Lord to give you “an abundance of counsellors” who can help you wisely navigate your circumstances.

Beware Isolation

“Whoever isolates himself seeks his own desire; he breaks out against all sound judgment.” (Proverbs 18 verse 1)

After years of obeying the Lord at great cost to himself while God’s people fell into apostasy around him, Elijah couldn’t take it anymore. He left the people and headed for the wilderness – alone. There, he retreated into a cave. When the Lord spoke to him, asking him twice why a prophet would stay away from the congregation he was sent to serve, twice Elijah had a ready answer: “The people of Israel have forsaken your covenant, thrown down your altars, and killed your prophets with the sword and I, even I only, am left and they seek my life, to take it away” (1 Kings 19 verse 10 and 14). I feel alone, so I’ve decided to be alone.

In response, the Lord graciously drew near to Elijah (verses 11 to 13). With a display of his power and his mercy, he reminded Elijah that he was not in fact, alone. But then the Lord did something we might not expect. He sent Elijah to rejoin the congregation (verses 15 to 21). The Lord revealed his plan to resolve Israel’s problem – by bringing justice against the wicked and showing mercy to the righteous – and he gave Elijah directions to find another faithful man, Elisha to assist him. When Elijah wanted to isolate himself, God sent him back to the assembly to get help.

When we get hurt, it can be uncomfortable to be in the congregation and to seek the help of others. Sometimes we are ashamed; sometimes the problems are so painful it feels impossible to talk about them; sometimes we’d rather try to deal with the situation in our own way; sometimes, like Elijah, we’ve been hurt by people so we don’t trust that people may be part of the solution. The bible, however, warns us against becoming isolated, even when (especially when!) we are struggling. In yesterday’s verse, Solomon urged us to get godly counsel for our own safety. In today’s verse, he highlights the danger of cutting ourselves off from other believers.

Throughout scripture, we see that an isolated Christian is a Christian in peril. Comparing scattered believers to sheep, the prophet Ezekiel laments how they “become food for all the wild beasts” (Ezekiel 34 verse 4). And Jesus explains how believers without pastoral care are vulnerable to the wolf who “snatches them and scatters them” (John 10 verse 12). A lone sheep wandering on a cliff edge is not safe; that’s just where an opportunistic wolf would like him to be.

Don’t be naïve. The Evil One – that “roaring lion” (1 Peter 5 verse 8) – would like to keep you isolated. As he draws you away from the preaching of the Word, the prayers of God’s people, and the opportunity for godly counsel, he also whispers lies into your soul (John 8 verse 44) convincing you that God doesn’t care, that other Christians aren’t good for you and that what you desire in this moment must be right. Don’t let him get you alone.

Read Isaiah 40 verses 9 to 11

What do these verses say the Lord does for his sheep.  Why is being part of a flock good for sheep? Do you think of being part of the church as “good news” (verse 9)? How do these verses shape your thinking?

Reflect – why does Satan love to isolate us? What sins are we especially vulnerable to when we are along?

Pray – confess to the Lord that you often feel alone in your church situation. Ask him to keep you from isolating yourself. Plead with him to show you the goodness of being among his people and getting help there.

Decide to Stay – Or Go

“Now Barnabas wanted to take with them John called Mark. But Paul thought best not to take with them one who had withdrawn from them in Pamphylia and had not gone with them to the work. And there arose a sharp disagreement, so that they separated from each other.” (Acts 15 verses 37 to 39)

Paul and Barnabas were a gospel team. They had laboured side-by-side to bring the gospel of Christ to various cities along the Mediterranean (Acts 13 and 14). Together they worked miracles, planted churches, and survived violent persecution. They even organised a church council to address false teaching (15 verses 1 to 35). Time after time, they made the choice to cooperate in kingdom work, but these verses expose a breach in their unity.

While Paul thought John Mark couldn’t be trusted to accompany them on their next trip, Barnabas thought he should come along. In the end, Paul went one way and Barnabas another.

They didn’t part ways lightly. More than simply a dispute over John Mark, this conflict was about qualification for ministry, the process for restoring trust and the good of the church. At times, people doing ministry together reach an impasse over the best way to work for the glory of God and the benefit of his kingdom.

This narrative highlights God’s power to advance the gospel and establish his church despite trouble, but it also acknowledges that Christians sometimes disagree and even break fellowship for a time.

The difficulties in your own church may mean you’ll need to consider whether or not to remain in that congregation. When we consider whether to leave a church, we first need to ask ourselves whether the issues at hand are truly significant. In scripture (and in Paul’s own writings!), divisions based on preference are a sign of immaturity (1 Corinthians 3 verses 1 to 9), petty quarrels are contrary to the gospel of Christ (2 Timothy 2 verse 23) and it’s our “glory” to overlook an offense (Proverbs 19 verse 11). Minor disagreements aren’t worth separating over. What’s more in any issue, our first step is always to pursue resolution in the hope of being able to say (1 Peter 4 verse 8; Matthew 5 verses 23 and 24, 18 verses 15 to 20). But irreconcilable issues that strike at gospel essentials or cause us to go against our biblically informed conscience, or situations where the church fails to address known sin, may mean we need to go.

The biblical truths from the previous meditations in this book will help in this decision. It requires great wisdom to determine if you should stay or go. You’ll need to seek the Spirit’s help in prayer, study the wisdom of God revealed in scripture and receive counsel from mature believers. Ultimately, you’ll need to make a decision and move forward, trusting God with the results and seeking to honour the Lord in whatever you choose to do.

Read Proverbs 3 verses 1 to 12

What does Solomon say are the benefits of walking in wisdom?

What does he give as the source of true wisdom?

What do these verses teach you about your greatest need as you decide about your hard church situation?

Reflect – “I made up my mind not to make another painful visit to you” wrote Paul to the Corinthian church (2 Corinthians 2 verse 1). Why is it important to eventually make up your mind when considering whether to stay or go in a particular church situation? What are some harmful effects of always waffling and never deciding?

Pray – cry out to the Lord for wisdom about whether you should stay or go. Ask him to be faithful to his promise to give wisdom to those who ask (James 1 verse 5).

Beware Strife

“Barnabas took Mark with him and sailed away to Cyprus, but Paul chose Silas and departed, having been commended by the brothers to the grace of the Lord. And he went through Syria and Cilicia, strengthening the churches.” (Acts 15 verses 39 to 41)

Paul and Barnabas’ story doesn’t end with their choice to part ways. Even after they made up their minds about leaving, they still had to decide how to relate to the rest of the church, to other churches and to each other. Paul sought to do this wisely and the elders of the church at Antioch “commended him … to the grace of the Lord” (verse 40). Even in their separation, Paul and Barnabas still had to resist Satan’s schemes and pursue God’s honour.

Whether you decide to stay in or leave your church beware the temptation to contribute to discord among believers. If you leave, you will need to leave honourably – being truthful with the elders about your reasons for leaving, following the process your church has for removing your membership and humbly remaining open to reconciliation and resolution. If you chose to stay, you will need to trust God with that decision and continue to uphold the vows you took when you joined the church.

After leaving Antioch, Paul took up the good of Christ’s body in other places, “strengthening the churches.” He and Barnabas may have chosen to break fellowship, but neither of them was finished with the church. Instead, both of them continued to serve the body for the rest of their lives. If you choose to leave your church you will need to move on well – joining another biblical church as soon as possible and using your gifts for the good of God’s people there. If you stay, you will need to trust that God has work for you to do and not allow Satan to tempt you to withhold good from your congregation

Acts 15 is not the last we hear from Paul about John Mark. In later letters, Paul instructs the church to welcome Mark (Colossians 4 verse 10), commends Mark for his kingdom usefulness (2 Timothy 4 verse 11), and calls him his fellow worker (Philemon 1 verse 24). Although Mark was the reason for Paul’s departure, he wasn’t the object of Paul’s disdain. If you leave your church you will still need to do good to the congregation you’ve left. You should continue to pray for them, rejoice with them when they grow in holiness and bear fruit, and speak well of them however you truthfully can. If you stay, you should pursue kindness and not allow the Evil One to provoke you to gossip or slander, setting congregation members against one another. Like Abram interceding for Lot (Genesis 18 verses 22 to 33), whether you stay or go you should seek the good of believers with whom you disagree.

Read Genesis 13 verses 2 to 13, 14 verses 14 to 16, 18 verses 22 to 33

Why did Lot and Abram part ways?

Where did Lot move?

After their separation, Adam continued to help Lot and seek his good. What did Abram do?

What do these passages teach us about righteous conduct toward others – even others we’ve had to separate from?

Reflect – Solomon wrote, “It is an honour for a man to keep aloof from strife, but every fool will be quarrelling” (Proverbs 20 verse 3). Which is harder: avoiding strife or joining quarrels? Why? Where do you feel that tension in your church situation?

Pray – tell the Lord about the times you have been tempted to stir up strife with gossip, unkindness, or lies. Ask him to keep you from the Evil One and help you do good to your church instead. Thank him for being the God who never withholds good from his people (Psalm 84 verse 11).

Section 5 – Why Should I Keep Showing Up?

In the next 6 meditations we are going to see that scripture gives us precious reasons to commit to the church, even when it is hard. The reasons I’ve chosen are deeper and more valuable than many of the motivations we often have for church participation; they’re better than unquestionably good things like friendship, support, wise counsel, and opportunities to serve. They’re better because the aren’t about other people or even about us. They’re better because they’re about Jesus.

 Christ Established His Church

“And (the Father) put all things under (Christ’s) feet and gave him as head over all things to the church, which is his body, the fullness of him who fills all in all.” (Ephesians 1 verses 22 and 23)

As we begin to answer the question “Why should I keep showing up?” we see that the unique character of the church is what compels our continued commitment to it, even when it’s hard. These verses teach us that the church was established by God and given to Christ. In a passage of effusive thanksgiving savouring the goodness of God’s creating and electing and redeeming work, the pinnacle of Paul’s reason for praise is the lordship of Christ over his church. The church is under Christ’s feet; he is over the church as its head.

As head of the church, Christ pours out his Spirit and indwells his church, filling it with his fullness. We see this most clearly in the church’s weekly gathering for worship. Christ speaks to us in the preaching of the Word (1 Thessalonians 2 verse 13). He prays with us in the corporate prayers of his gathered people (Romans 8 verse 34). He calls us to sing together and draws our hearts to praise (Hebrews 2 verse 12). He gives us confidence to confess our faith (Hebrews 4 verses 14 to 16). He seals us for his own in the visible tangible signs of baptism and the Lord’s Supper (Romans 6 verse 4; 1 Corinthians 11 verse 24). Sunday after Sunday, Christ comes to his church, ministers his grace, and displays his glory.

When we are hurt we might be tempted to give up and walk away from the church, but the scripture tells us that would be to our detriment. Even if we choose to stop showing up, Jesus never will. The church is the place of Christ’s visible reign and is where he ordains the mans of grace we desperately need. Although church membership is often neither convenient nor comfortable, we can be encouraged that Christ established his church and we can trust that he has good for us in it.

Read Ephesians 4 verses 8 to 16

Who was the one who ascended?

What gifts did he give?

What is the purpose of those gifts?

How does the truth that Christ rules and equips his church help you to see the church as a unique institution?

Reflect – what are some human organisations you have joined in the past? In what ways is commitment to the church different from commitment to those organisations?

Pray – confess to the Lord the ways you find it hard to continue showing up in your local church. Ask him for help to trust his good purposes in establishing the church Plead with him to show you his fullness as you commit to being part of his body.

Christ Loves His Church

“Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, so that he might present the church to himself in splendour.” (Ephesians 5 verses 25 to 27)

What’s something you’ve learned to love because someone you love also loves it? Things you never thought twice about are now precious to you because someone you cared about showed you their value.

There’s not much about the church that would naturally incline us to love it. An unimpressive group of people with off-key voices and awkward habits doesn’t automatically stir up devotion. And when we are hurt, we are even less likely to overflow with affection for the congregation on Sundays. But these verses give us a powerful reason to keep showing up: Jesus loves the church.

As Ephesians 5 explains, the grand goal of Christ’s redeeming work is his church. Although he already knew every sin of every person in his church – every foolish word, harmful act, rebellious thought and impure desire – he still became a man on their behalf. And “having loved his own who were in the world, he loved them to the end” (John 13 verse 1). Even when his people’s sins inflicted on him the greatest harm that has ever been done, Christ overflowed in love. Christ lived a perfect life, was crucified and buried, and rose again – all so that he could gather his people into his church.

Furthermore, he continues to be intimately concerned with the well-being of his church – providing the Word and Spirit for her sanctification and cleansing. Every Sunday, when God’s people meet together as the dwelling place of the Spirit (1 Corinthians 3 verse 16) to receive his Word read and sung and preached and prayed, Christ demonstrates his ongoing love for us. And he promises to tenderly care for his church until that day when he “present(s) the church to himself in splendour” (Ephesians 5 verse 27).

After conflict, neglect or disappointment in the church, we need this truth. In this verse and throughout all of the scripture, the Lord affirms that he loves his people so much that he would even send the Son to die for them. The church we belong to is “the church of God, which he obtained with his own blood” (Acts 20 verse 28). Although right now we may not be able to see anything beautiful about the people with whom we worship Christ declares them lovely.

Read 1 John 4 verses 7 to 21

What does God command in these verses?

What are some of the reasons given why we should love one another in the church?

It might seem impossible to try to love the church, especially when you’ve been hurt.

How does it encourage you to know that God’s love abides in you by his Spirit?

Reflect – what is something you’ve grown to love because of someone else? Pastor Jeremy Walker wrote “It is like God to love those whom God loves – it is godliness.” Have you ever thought of loving the church as essential to godliness?

Pray – tell the Lord about ways that your love for the church has shrivelled. Thank him for God’s abundant love for you and for everyone who belongs to him. Ask him to send his Spirit to cultivate love for the church in your heart.

Christ Unites His Church

“I do not ask for these only, but also for those who will believe in me through their word, that they may all be one, just as you, Father, are in me, and I in you, that they also may be in us, so that the world may believe that you have sent me.” (John 17 verses 20 and 21)

During his earthly ministry, Jesus witnessed discord and division among his disciples. We might expect that living with Jesus and listening daily to his teaching would have made them completely peaceful group. But the 12 argued with each other over who was the greatest (Mark 9 verses 33 and 34) and over who would attain places of honour in his kingdom (Matthew 20 verses 20 to 24). One of his disciples even left the others in order to betray him (John 18 verses 1 to 11).

Our greatest hurts in the church can come when we experience division and conflict in the congregation – when friends disagree, righteous people part ways, and members of the same body take sides against each other. Knowing this, in John 17 Jesus prayed for unity for his church. In these verses we read the words of Jesus’ high priestly prayer, the prayer h offered just before his arrest and crucifixion. Having prayed for himself and for his disciples, Jesus then began to pray for the church that would soon grow from the disciples’ gospel proclamation (verse 20). With these words, Jesus prayed for us.

He asked the father to make his people one, even “perfectly one” (verse 23). The unity Christ pleads for is so compete that it parallels the unity between the persons of the trinity (verse 22). Jesus didn’t pray for surface-level politeness, he prayed for Godlike oneness.

And the prayers of the Son are always answered by the Father. Our sinless Saviour prayed perfectly according to the will of the Father, and so we can trust that his prayers for unity will be answered.

Any oneness we experience in this life is a reason to praise God and to look with hope for God to use it in the conversion of those around us (verse 21). And because of Christ’s prayers and his work on the cross, the church’s final unity is assured. The perfect Christ will have a perfect bridge (Ephesians 5 verse 2) and the whole world will bow before him (Philippians 2 verse 10).

You can work for unity in the church with confidence even if sometimes through tears – knowing Jesus is praying for you. Although you may not experience complete unity in any congregation in this life, you have every reason to pray fo it yourself, to keep showing up expecting it, and to look for its fullness in eternity. What the Son asks, the father grants.

Read Psalm 133

How does it encourage you to know that God delights in unity among his people? How do these verses give you boldness to pray for greater unity in your own church?

Reflect – Ephesians reminds us that “(Christ) himself is our peace” (chapter 2 verse 14) and then calls us to be “eager to maintain the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace” (chapter 4 verse 3). How is it helpful to know that Christ is the one who actually accomplishes peace? What are some practical ways you can seek to maintain the God-wrought unity of your church?

Pray – using the words of Psalm 133, ask the Lord to grant unity to your church. Praise him for being the God who can “command blessing”. Tell him about ways division and conflict have brought sorrow to your congregation. Plead with him to send his Spirit and give your church “good and pleasant” unity. Thank him for being the source of life.

Christ Dwells with His Church

“I will not leave you as orphans; I will come to you. Yet a little while and the world will see me no more, but you will see me. Because I live, you also will live. In that day you will know that I am in my Father, and you in me and I in you.” (John 14 verses 18 to 20)

At some point, you’ve probably felt alone in church. Whether you were sitting in a too-empty ow of chairs or were surrounded by people but experiencing hardship, you know what it’s like to be in a congregation and yet feel isolated. It can be difficult to keep showing up.

In today’s verses, Jesus prepared his disciples for the day when he would no longer be bodily present on earth. He knew the believers would be confused and saddened when he left t heaven, and so he promised them he would always be resent with his church by his Spirit. The congregation of believers, Jesus says, is in him by faith and he is in us by his Spirit. Among the saints who are “in Christ” (Ephesians 1 verse 1, Philippians 1 verse 1, Colossians 1 verse 2, 1 Thessalonians 1 verse 1, 2 Thessalonians 1 verse 1), Jesus dwells.

Jesus’ promise can encourage us when we feel alone in the congregation. Most of us probably know that when we worship together, we draw near to Christ. We petition him in prayer, praise him in song and exalt him in our confession of faith. we "enter his gates with thanksgiving an his courts with praise” (Psalm 100 verse 4). Even better, the writer to the Hebrews tells us that we enter the heavenly places and the very presence of Jesus (Hebrews 12 verses 18 to 24).

We draw near to Christ in worship, but what we may not realise is that he also draws near to us. Christ is always present with us, wherever we are, but he especially promises his presence by his Spirit when we gather as the church (Matthew 18 verse 20; 28 verse 20). He is our preacher, proclaiming his Word to us; he is our worship leader, singing the songs of heaven alongside us (Hebrews 2 verses 11 to 13). Christ knows the worst about the sinners for whom he died, and yet he is not ashamed to call them brothers and sisters and to come close to them (Hebrews 2 verse 11). He promises to be in our midst, no matter how few or bedraggled we are. The world doesn’t recognise Christ’s continued presence, but the church knows it intimately (John 14 verse 19).

Hurtful situations in the church can strip away many aspects of church life that we once enjoyed. Conflicts diminish our fellowship within the community. Sin erodes our trust in church leaders. Personal sorrow clouds our joy in worship. Disappointments dampen our hope for the church’s future. But these can’t touch the most precious reality of life in the church; nothing can remove Christ from among his people.

When we come to worship with the church, Jesus will be there. And, on days when church hurts, this is a precious reason to keep showing up.

Read Matthew 28 verses 16 to 20

What is Jesus commissioning his church to do?

In what ways might church members feel alone in this task?

What is the encouragement he gives them?

How does this comfort you today?

Reflect – prophesying to a divided kingdom, Zephaniah foretold a day when God’s people would hear: “The Lord your God is in your midst” (chapter 3 verse 17). When our human relationships are hard, why is it particularly precious to know that God is near?

Pray – tell the Lord about a time when you have felt alone in the church. Plead with him the promise of today’s verse, asking him to draw near to you as you worship with his people.

Christ Executes Justice in His Church

“Do you not know that you are God’s temple and that God’s Spirit dwells in you? If anyone destroys God’s temple, God will destroy him. For God’s temple is holy and you are that temple.” (1 Corinthians 3 verses 16 and 17)

As people created in the image of a righteous and just God, we long for righteousness and justice to reign in the world and in his church. And when they don’t seem to, we are rightly troubled.

Thankfully these verses remind us, sin never goes unaddressed by God. Writing to a church that was divided. Paul called for gospel unity (1 Corinthians 3 verses 1 to 15). But if members persisted in fracturing the church, Paul warned that they would face God’s justice.

First, Paul affirmed the church’s value: “You are God’s temple and ... God’s Spirit dwells in you.” Then he declared that the penalty for harming the church would fit the crime: “if anyone destroys God’s temple, God will destroy him.”  If someone sets a distant, abandoned building on fire, you’d be mildly concerned. If someone sets your house on fire, you’d be outraged. So it is with the Lord. The church is his dwelling and anyone who damages it will be liable to judgment.

On the basis of God’s promise, you can take your burden over sin in the church to him You can be comforted that every such sin receives it due penalty. God has either laid it on Christ at the cross, or he will punish the sinner on the day of judgment. He will judge the careless and hurtful words spoken in back rooms and congregational meetings (Matthew 12 verse 36). He will address church leaders whose example and teaching leads others to sin (Matthew 18 verses 1 to 10). He will even adjudicate sinful thoughts – lust, partiality, envy, green (Hebrews 4 verses 11 to 13). Every sinning church members will one day stand “naked and exposed” before Christ, required to “give account” (verse 13).

You can seek a measure of justice in this life (through church discipline and, where appropriate, civil authorities) and you can trust God to bring complete justice in eternity. You can keep showing up, knowing that you may sometimes be sinned against in church, but also knowing the Christ guarantees justice.

Read Matthew 18 verses 1 to 10

What does Jesus say about the value of believing children?

What does he say about the punishment for those who would cause them to sin?

Do these verses comfort you in your own situation?

Why or why not?

Reflect – church discipline  or censure (when the church takes official action to rebuke and address sin among its members) can be imperfect. It is however, one significant way that Christ rules over his church and brings a measure of justice even in this life (Matthew 18 verses 15 to 20; 1 Corinthians 5 verses 1 to 5). Why is it important to join a church that values and practices church discipline?

Pray – call out to the Lord. Tell him about the sin in your church that is hurting you and others. Ask him to grant justice in this life and in eternity. Plead with him the words of today’s verses, reminding him of the church’s value and his promise to punish those who would destroy it.

Christ Perfects His Church

“Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her ... so that he might present the church to himself in splendour, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish.” (Ephesians 5 verses 25, 27)

“To live with saints we love, that will be glory. To live below with saints we know, now that’s a different story!” It highlights the genuine disconnect we often feel between our current experiences and our vision of the church in eternity. Compared with the gathering in heaven, church on earth feels pretty rough. It might seem easier not to think about the future at all.

In these verses, however, Paul encourages us to meditate on what’s next for the church. First, we see that the church is so important to Christ that he gave himself up for her. As we noted on day 29, Christ left his place in heaven to take on human flesh and die the painful and shameful death of the cross for the sake of his church. What’s more, says Paul, his sacrifice was not in vain. Christ did all of this with a grand goal in mind: the church’s perfection. One day, because of his work on the cross the through his Word and Spirit, his gathered people will be sinless, strong, mature and beautiful (see Ephesians 4 verses 11 to 16).

“Weeping may tarry for the night, but joy comes with the morning” writes the psalmist (30 verse 5) and this is our hope in the church. The sorrows of life in the church are momentary, but the perfection of the church is certain and eternal. Little by little now, and completely one day soon, every wrong will be righted, every loss restored and every division healed.

Although our experience of the church is often accompanied by hurt, we can trust the Lord’s promise that he is at work sanctifying his church today and that he will make his church perfect in the end. We keep showing up because we know that what we have no is not all there is to experience. Like the smiling wedding guest who exclaims to the bride, “I remember when you were still in diapers!” we will one day have an opportunity to celebrate firsthand just how far Christ’s church has come.

Read Revelation 7 verses 9 to 12

God shoed John the church’s future in order to strengthen churches that were scattered, persecuted and struggling. In his vision, John saw a church that is immense and diverse (verse 9). How can that encourage you when your church seems small or ineffective?

John saw a church gathered in the near presence of the Lord (verse 9). How can that encourage you when your church seems apathetic or immature?

John saw a church that boldly and harmoniously worships (verses 10 to 12). How can that encourage you when your church seems ineffective or divided?

Reflect – do you enjoy home makeover shows? Are you interested in “before” and “after” pictures of hairstyles or weight loss? Does it make you happy to have rooted for a team no one else expected to win? Most of us love a surprising transformation. Spend time meditating on the glorious future of the church, and allow Christ’s promise of radical transformation to delight your heart as you participate in the church on earth.

Pray – praise God for ruling over his church and for loving his church. Thank him for sending Christ to make his church holy. Using the words of today’s verses, ask him to work in your congregation: erasing spots, smoothing wrinkles, healing blemishes. Ask him to encourage you now with thoughts of the church’s perfect future.

SECTION 6 – WHAT HAVE OTHERS DONE IN MY SITUATION?

In this section, we’re going to revisit the 7 people or groups from the bible whom we met in the first section, Paul, David, Anna, the Philippians, the returned exiles, Hannah and even Jesus had stories like ours – stories of experiencing hurt in the assembly of believers. But thankfully, these hardships were not the end of their church stories, and your hardship doesn’t have to be the end of yours. These individuals all found a way forward in the covenant community: Paul opened his heart after hurt., Anna kept her aging eyes on the Messiah and Hannah sacrificially invested in a better future for God’s people. Although none of them received a tidy solution to their past hurt, all of them went on to bear fruit and flourish.

God does bring good from hard experiences, Jesus comes to his church “to comfort all who mourn; to grant to those who mourn in Zion – to give them a beautiful headdress instead of ashes, the oil of gladness instead of mourning, the garment of praise instead of a faint spirit; that they may be called oaks of righteousness, the planting of the Lord, that he may be glorified” (Isaiah 61 verses 2 and 3). Al of the people in this section testify with their lives to the truth of this promise.

And if the Lord was gracious to them, he will also be gracious to you.

Paul Opened His Heart

“Our heart is wide open. You are not restricted by us, but you are restricted in your own affections. In return (I speak as to children) widen your hearts also.” (2 Corinthians 6 verses 11 to 13)

Paul experienced significant hurt in the church. When he was imprisoned for the sake of the gospel, no one stood with him and all the church members deserted him (2 Timothy 4 verse 16). Elsewhere in the New Testament, we read about how Paul was rebuffed by church leaders (Acts 9 verse 26), criticized by false teachers and their followers (2 Corinthians 10 verse 10), misrepresented by church members (2 Peter 3 verse 16) and neglected by self-centred Christians (Philemon 2 verse 21). We might assume withdrawal from the church – whether physically or emotionally – would be his next step.

But Paul didn’t choose retreat. He chose to open the door of his heart. Paul knew that the Corinthians’ problems were their problems: “You are not restricted by us.” The sin in their hearts, their human weakness and the wiles of Satan had all conspired to shrivel their love toward Paul. None of that was Paul’s fault. In our own circumstances too, we can acknowledge that other people’s sin is their own responsibility, and we can remember that their sin doesn’t have the right to dictate our response.

Rather than imitating the restricted Corinthians, Paul lifted his eyes to a better model, imitating Christ himself, who “loved us and gave himself up for us” (Ephesians 5 verses 1 and 2).  Whatever Satan’s schemes or sinners’ intentions, an experience of hurt doesn’t have the power to close us off from the way of love in the church. Christ has set us free. Like Paul, we can look for the Spirit to “widen (our) hearts” toward his people and to help us demonstrate tender affection for them.

Read Ephesians 5 verses 1 and 2

How did Christ demonstrate love?

How does being “beloved children” (verse 1) enable us to “walk in love” (verse 2), even toward those who have wronged us?

Reflect – earlier in 2 Corinthians, Paul say, “I wrote to you out of much affliction and anguish of heart and with many tears, not to cause you pain but to let you know the abundant love that I have for you” (chapter 2 verse 4). In the midst of affliction, Paul acted in love. Plan one loving thing you could do for someone who has hurt you. It could be as simple as praying for him or her or making an effort to say hello when you next meet.

Pray – using the words of today’s verse, ask the Lord to open your heart and enable you to walk in love.

David Chose to Forgive

“And the king said to Shimei, ‘You shall not die.’ And the king gave him his oath.” 2 Samuel 19 verse 23

When David was at an extremely low point in his life, a member of the covenant community attacked him – literally. Shimei, a man from Saul’s household, came out to met David; he “cursed continually” (2 Samuel 16 verse 5) and “threw stones at David” and at everyone who was with him (verse 6). In the hearing of David’s servants and soldiers, Shimei called the king a “worthless man” (verse 7) and taunted him about his rebellious son, Absalom (verse 8).

Immediately, David’s companion Abishai asked to kil Shimei for his insolence, but David stayed his hand. He entrusted himself to the Lord: either God had told Shimei to curse him or God would curse Shimei (verses 10 to 12). Later Shimei came out to meet David again. This time, Shimei asked for mercy. Again, Abishai urged vengeance. And again with these verses, David stayed his hand. Twice, David had the opportunity to kill Shimei and twice he chose to forgive.

David’s response to Shimei and also his psalm of anguish over the friend who wounded him (Psalm 55), rest on a god who is sovereign and loving. David didn’t understand why these hardships came to him, yet he knew that God would do what was best. He cast himself on a God who listens to his people (55 verse 1, 17) saves the weak (verses 16 and 18), sustains the righteous (verse 22) and brings justice (verses 9, 19; 2 Samuel 16 verses 10 to 12). When we, likewise, have been sinned against, we can say with David, “But I will trust in you.” (Psalm 55 verse 23).

This, in turn, allows us to extend forgiveness to those who have sinned against us. Because we believe that God’s justice and mercy will be rightly administered – “the Lord will look on the wrong done to me, and ... the Lord will repay me with good for his cursing” (2 Samuel 16 verse 12) – we can ask for God’s help to overlook the offenses that have come against us. When someone has gossiped about us, when church members walk out in anger, when the pastor ignores a request for help, we can leave it with the Lord, knowing that he sees. We can refuse to hold that sin against the person, knowing God will deal justly. We can step freely into the future, trusting God will do what is right.

In this, we imitate our Lord Jesus, about whom Peter tells us, “When he was reviled he did not revile in return; when he suffered, he did not threaten, but continued entrusting himself to him who judges justly” (1 Peter 2 verse 23). On the cross Jesus could say “Father forgive them” (Luke 23 verse 34) because he rested on God’s sovereign goodness.

If God is trustworthy – and he is! – we, like David and Jesus can choose to forgive.

Read Luke 23 verses 32 to 38

List the sins that were committed against Jesus in this passage.

What was Jesus’ response?

How might God be calling you to imitate Jesus in your current situation?

Reflect – Tim Keller defines forgiveness as “a promise not to exact the price of sin from the person who hurt you.” What then, are the implications of forgiveness for our thoughts, words, and actions toward the other person?

Pray – praise the Lord for being a God who judges justly. Ask him to do what is best in your church situation. Ask for the help of his Spirit to forgive those who have sinned against you. Thank him for forgiving you all your sins.

Anna Continued to Worship

“She did not depart from the temple, worshiping with fating and prayer night and day. And coming up at that very hour she began to give thanks to God and to speak of him to all who were waiting, for the redemption of Jerusalem.” Luke 2 verses 37 and 38

Often the thing we most want to do when church hurts is to stop showing up. Sunday becomes the hardest day of the week, and it feels easier – and safe – to stay home. If we don’t engage, we can’t get hurt. If we don’t try, we won’t be disappointed. If we don’t go, we can’t be ignored.

As we saw on day 3, Anna had many reasons to stay away from worship. Because she lived in a fallen world, her husband had died and her own body was wasting away. Because she lived among sinners, she was vulnerable. Because Satan prowled, she faced temptations to discouragement.

Anna could have allowed these circumstances to cut her off from the place of God’s promised presence, but she didn’t. As a faithful Jew, she would have known the words of Malachi: “The Lord whom you seek will suddenly come to his temple” (chapter 3 verse 1).  Anna knew that the Messiah was going to show up in the temple, and so she didn’t let anything keep her from showing up there too. Night and day, with fasting and prayer, over months and years, she continued to worship the Lord exactly where he said he would be.

Then “coming up at that very hour” Anna saw Jesus. To unspiritual eyes, the baby didn’t look much like a Saviour or a king, but to the eyes of the elderly woman who had already been worshipping him for decades, he looked like a promise fulfilled. Joyfully, she announced his arrival to all the faithful. In that moment in the temple, Anna was still old. She was still a widow. She was still vulnerable. But she was not alone.

We too have the Lord’s promise that he will be present by his spirit when we worship with his congregation: “Where two or three are gathered in my name, there am I among them” (Matthew 18 verse 20). Although the actions of sinners and the devices of Satan might be significant obstacle as we consider going to worship, they can’t nullify this promise or bar us from drawing near to Christ.

Whatever our individual circumstances, corporate worship is always an act of resistance. In every pew sits a person whom Christ has rescued from the clutches of hell and redeemed for his glory. What’s more, each worshipper has defied Satan’s entrapments and sin’s discouragements that very day in order to come into God’s presence with praise. Like Anna, each of us shows up to worship against the world’s odds. And Christ – who triumphed over evil on our behalf – meets us there.

Read Luke 18 verses 1 to 8

What did the widow do?

What did the judge do?

How is God like the judge in this passage?

How is he different?

Why does Jesus say he told this parable?

How can this parable encourage you to continue approaching God in worship even when church hurts.

Reflect – why might Satan want to keep you from worship and from being in Christ's presence? How does recognizing his evil intent help you to withstand his tactics?

Pray – tell the Lord about a time when you wanted to stop going to church to worship. Ask him to give you the spirit of Anna, who “did not depart” from the pace of worship. Thank him for promising to meet with his people when they gather (Matthew 18 verse 20). Look expectantly for Christ’s presence the next time you are in church.

Philippian Believers pursued Reconciliation

“Yes, I ask you also, true companion, help these women, who have laboured side by side with me in the gospel together with Clement and the rest of my fellow workers, whose names are in the book of life.” Philippians 4 verse 3

The people in Philippi may have wanted to avoid saying something. Euodia and Syntyche were arguing with each other and the whole church knew about it. The congregation members may have wanted to trust that the 2 women would sort it out on their own. Or they may have assumed the situation was hopeless. But Paul knew the women needed help. He called on the Philippian pastor (“I ask you... help these women” verse 3) and by publicly announcing the plan, he encouraged the entire congregation to support their reconciliation.

In times of church conflict, it can seem easier not to get involved. We may naively hope the situation will resolve on its own or assume it never will. We may be reluctant to seem nosy by asking a pastor to help, or we may be so hurt by the things we’ve witnessed that we’re reluctant to wade in again. In any case, keeping our distance (or leaving the church entirely) presents an attractive option.

But the disunity of arguing church members doesn’t have the power to push us away from the church.  Although Satan would love to isolate us by multiplying the evil effects of a single argument, Christ came to be our peace (Ephesians 2 verse 14). In the power of his Spirit and as far as it depends on us, we seek to “live peaceably with all” (Romans 12 verse 18). Even when other believers are acting foolishly, we can commit to showing up with grace and a readiness to forgive. And rather than walking past, we can help others do the same.

When conflicts arise in the church, we can foster peace. Our first recourse is prayer – seeking the help of the reconciling God who delights when his people dwell in unity (Psalm 133) We can also promote unity by being careful with our own speech – saying only what is edifying and resisting Satan’s attempts to draw us into foolish words. Depending on our relationship to the people in the conflict, we may also have opportunity to offer counsel – encouraging church members to repent and forgive, and walking the steps of resolution with them (Matthew 18 verses 15 to 18).

Read Matthew 18 verses 15 to 20

What are the steps for addressing sin that Jesus lays out? What do these verses teach you about when it may be necessary for additional people to get involved in conflict resolution? How does it encourage you to know that Jesus promises his presence in this process (verse 20)?

Reflect – write out the words of Matthew 18 verse 20 and post the verse somewhere you will see it on Sunday morning before church: stick it on your bathroom mirror, put it next to your car keys, or tape it to the cover of your bible. Resolve, by the Spirit’s help, to promote peace and reconciliation wherever you can and take comfort from Christ’s promised presence.

Pray – tell the Lord about the disunity in our church. Ask him to grant peace. Ask him to equip you to help. Thank him for being the peace we need (Ephesians 2 verse 14).

Returned exiles kept serving

“But Zerubbabel, Jeshua, and the rest of the heads of fathers’ houses in Israel said to them, “You have nothing to do with us in building a house to our God; but we alone will build to the Lord, the God of Israel, as King Cyrus the king of Persia has commanded us.” (Ezra 4 verse 3)

The returned exiles were grieving. Having worshipped in the first temple, the old men wept at the smallness of the second (Ezra 3 verses 12 to 13). The ark was gone, the people were diminished in number, and their place of worship was a shadow of its former glory. The future looked bleak. What’s more, enemies of God’s people tried to deceive them and then to discourage them (chapter 4 verses 1 and 2, 4 and 5). It’s not hard to imagine the old men considering whether they should just give up.

In these verses however the men rallied. They remembered the purpose of the temple (“a house to our God”), the goal of their construction labours (“to the Lord, the god of Israel”) and their unique calling to do the work (“we alone will build ... as the king ... has commanded us”). They refused to let the wicked schemes of others or the outward insignificance of their task keep them from working for God’s glory in the place of worship, one cedar plank at a time.

When the situation in our own churches is discouraging, we can resist the temptation to give up and instead find ways to serve God. When a beloved pastor moves on, e can look for opportunities to encourage his replacement. When a favourite ministry ceases to exist, we can offer to help with a different one. When fewer and fewer people show up each Sunday, we can do the good work of praying earnestly for the Lord to add to the number those who are being saved. In the face of hardship, there is still good work for the church to do in the world – “the harvest is plentiful” promised Jesus (Matthew 9 verse 37) – and we have the privilege of persisting in it.

Labouring in the church after hurt is not easy; we often feel weak and our discouragement is great. But as we keep serving, we – like the returned exiles – will slowly rebuild what has been damaged. The Lord may use our labours to renew evangelistic efforts, restore relationships, or revive biblical commitment in the congregation. And even if our church never returns to its former glory, we will know we have served him. As Ezra reported about the faithful workers, “the eye of their God was on (them)” (Ezra 5 verse 5).

Read Romans 16

What are some ways the people in this list served Paul and the church?

How did serving alongside these people foster Pauls love for them?

How have you seen service create similar bonds of love?

As you keep serving in your church, how can it encourage you that the Lord tenderly records each of these people’s names and their work in his Word?

Reflect – Elisabeth Elliot, widow of Jim Elliot and missionary to the Waorani people of Ecuador, said, “I don’t know any more comforting motto in my life – and it has become a life motto for me – than these words, ‘Do the next thing’”. Through loss, grief, hardship, Elliot encouraged her heart that the Lord always had something – however small – for her to do for his glory. What might be the “next thing” the Lord would have you do in your church this week?

Pray – tell the Lord about the discouragements that you face in your church. Ask him to help you to remember the purpose of serving in the church: his glory. Ask him to give you strength to continue to serve.

Hannah decided to commit

“For this child I prayed, and the Lord has granted me my petition that I made to him. Therefore I have lent him to the Lord: As long as he lives, he is lent to the Lord.” (1 Samuel 1 verses 27 to 28)

Hannah had been badly mistreated by the man who was supposed to provide spiritual care for her and the rest of the congregation. Eli ignored her needs and falsely accused her, and he allowed his sons to use their own leadership position to corrupt corporate worship and harm God’s people (1 Samuel 1 verses 9 to 18; 2 verses 12 to 17; 2 verses 22 to 25)  Eli was both sinful and weak, and his actions received their just consequences. But “the Lord remembered” Hannah and gave her the child she prayed for (chapter 1 verse 19).

Holding the infant Samuel in her arms, Hannah had a choice. She could allow her leaders’ failures to keep her from worshipping the Lord and beholding his redemptive work among his people, or she could press on. Ultimately, Hannah’s love for the Lord compelled her. She knew his goodness and power, she rested in his justice and she trusted his promises (see 1 Samuel 2 verses 1 to 10). Most of al, Hannah believed God would one day send his perfect anointed King to lead his people (verse 10) – and she decided to pursue the good of his kingdom until he did.

For Hannah, committing to God’s redeeming work meant giving up her only son so he could be a better spiritual leader than Eli and his sons were. She took young Samuel to Shiloh, and she left him there to become a priest (1 Samuel 1 verses 24 to 28). She knew God’s people were precious to him and so she willingly – and radically – sacrifices for their good. In this, she foretold the work of God himself who "did not spare his own son but gave him up for us all” (Romans 8 verse 32), sending Jesus to be the Good Shepherd who rescues his people from the clutches of destructive shepherds and gathers them into one healthy flock (Jeremiah 23 verses 1 to 6; John 10 verses 11 to 16).

We too have a choice. Having been hurt by weak or sinful leaders, we can walk away and allow their conduct to cut us off from the church’s future. But Hannah – and the Lord – shows us another possibility. We can commit. Whether we stay in one congregation or join another, we can rejoice that the father gave up his Son for his people. We can trust that King Jesus is advancing his kingdom in the church, and we can sacrifice for its good. We can even, like Hannah, believe so strongly in the future of God’s people that we raise our children to love the church and to desire to serve in it 

Year after year, as Hannah returned to Shiloh with clothes for Samuel, she reaffirmed her decision to hope in the Lord and invest in his people’s good (1 Samuel 2 verse 18 – 21). In this, she points us to a way forward.

Read 1 Samuel 2 verses 1 to 10

Which phrases reveal Hannah’s confidence in God’s goodness, power and justice? Where does she express her hope for the future? How does knowing God’s character help you commit to the future of his kingdom in the church?

Reflect – if you knew one day your team would win a championship, your department a big contract or your music group a show at a major venue, how would that encourage you to sacrifice today?

How does the guaranteed future of the church motivate you to invest in it this week?

Pray – using words from Hannah’s prayer (1 Samuel 2 verses 1 to 10), thank God for his goodness and power, praise him for his justice and ask him to send his King to take up his visible reign. Ask the Lord to give you a heart that exults in him and works for the good of this kingdom until his return.

Jesus Looked to Eternity

“And I saw the holy city, new Jerusalem, coming don out of heaven from God, prepared as a bride adorned for her husband. And I heard a loud voice from the throne saying, ‘Behold the dwelling place of God is with man. He will dwell with them, and they will be is people and God himself will be with them as their God. He will wipe away every tear from their eyes, and death shall be no more, neither shall there be mourning, nor crying, nor pain anymore, for the former things have passed away.’” (Revelation 21 verses 2 to 4)

The longer I’ve been in the church, the more I’ve realised church is hard at times for everyone. Walking into the sanctuary on Sunday morning, I join an assembly of struggling people. The woman to your right who attends worship over the objections of her unbelieving husband. The man on my left whose young adult child was excommunicated. The family whose previous pastor engage in scandalous sin and who are still wary. The single person who feels overlooked and neglected, the mother of four who feels overlooked neglected. The teenager who wishes the youth group were bigger, like it used to be. Even the pastor, who knows his sermon will be met with critical comments – or complete indifference – at the door.

Our reasons for sighing on Sunday are diverse, but in one way or another, we all know what it feels like to hurt in church. So does Jesus. Christ experienced mistreatment, abandonment and little fruit – even among his closest followers. The troubles and temptations that have come to us also came to him (Hebrews 4 verse 15). And yet, he continues to love his church.

How did Jesus have the strength to endure suffering on behalf of the church? He was looking to the church’s future. The writer to the Hebrews tells us that Jesus “for the joy that was set before him endured the cross, despising the shame” (Hebrews 12 verse 2). Jesus trusted the Father and believed that the church’s future would be joyful. By thinking much of eternity he was able to think little of his suffering (see 2 Corinthians 4 verses 17 and 18).

In these verses, the Lord graciously gives us a glimpse of the church. In eternity so that he too can set our eyes on that final day when the church will be a place of untarnished joy and worship. In that day, no one will sin against us and we will sin against no-one. In that day, our Lord will set all wrongs right and heal all wounds. In that day our weaknesses will be turned to strength and our blemishes to beauty. An in that day, we will dwell together with our God forever.

Take heart!

Read Psalm 22 verses 19 to 31

Jesus took this psalm on his lips as he was suffering on the cross for the sake of the church (Matthew 27 verse 46; Mark 15 verse 34). What are some of the metaphors for hardship (verses 20 and 21)?

What are some of the images of the congregation and Christ’s place in it (verses 22 to 31)?

How do you think this vision of the church’s future gave Jesus strength in his final earthly hours?

How can it give you strength in your current trouble?

Reflect – how does knowing that church is hard in some way for everyone give you sympathy for the people in your congregation? How can each person’s example of overcoming obstacles to show up on Sunday be an encouragement to the others?

Pray – praise God for one thing you’ve learned about him in this book. Ask him for help to put into practice one thing you’ve realised you need to do. Thank him for having his eyes toward you and his ears toward your cry (Psalm 34 verse 15).